Dawn of A New Day
by NightcatMau
Summary: When Valkyrie returns to Ireland she and Skulduggery have a new mission: to enter the land of the dead and find two people who are due to return to the land of the living. But can they trust the New Grand Mage? Set after the novels, so major series running spoilers, obviously.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Fletcher, China, Tanith, Saracen, Dex, Erskine, Darquesse, Tipstaff, Ghastly, Anton or Xena. If you read the last novel I may have taken a few liberties but this is set right after the end, so Val is in her 20s. Can I can them or what? Oh, contains spoilers, so you might want to read the novel first.

* * *

We were back in Ireland, Fletcher having transported us to Skulduggery's house. But I wasn't to get any rest. We had to report to the Sanctuary the moment I was back. I sighed as I settled into the Bentley again. "Seatbelt. I missed you, you know."

"Skulduggery, you bullied Fletcher into bringing you to see me every morning and rang me every night." I grumbled, but then smiled at him. "I can't believe you wouldn't take a case without me."

"You _were_ my case. Grand Mage Sorrows wanted you back at any cost. Besides, I refused to work without you." I looked over at him, he was serious. "Now do you know that punishment doesn't work?" He said more gently.

"A little. But all the terrible things I did-"

"If you live long enough, and being my partner, that's a chancy thing, you can work towards redemption" He cut in smoothly.

"Do you want to even be partners? People fear me, they hate me."

"The same as they feel towards me, Valkyrie. But you get used to it. Your family doesn't fear you, your friends don't. And in the end that's all that matters. I hope you're up to a case after getting batted about. Do you need the medical wing?" He asked as we entered the Sanctuary.

"No, I'm fine. I'm glad Xena stayed behind. It isn't like I could have a dog near you, and she found a new friend."

"Indeed." Skulduggery said irritably and I realized he was jealous.

"And he's handsome, single, he's going to become a rock star, you know." I teased.

"That's enough of that." Skulduggery growled as we entered the elevator to be whisked up to China's suite. She seemed happy to see us for once, and actually gave me what seemed to be a real smile.

"Valkyrie, my dear, you've been missed." She said. "Come, sit. Have some coffee, let's get caught up, shall we?" I nodded and sat, accepting the coffee Tipstaff brought me. I didn't trust China. She wasn't evil, exactly, but she was dangerous, even more so as the Grand Mage. I planned on telling her as little as possible.

"So, how was America, my dear?" She asked and I kept the irritation off my face.

"China, I get it. I went away and you're angry with me. A lot of people are likely angry with me, and if it lasts long enough I'll just go away again." I hadn't planned on saying that, but the shock appeared on her face was worth it.

"I didn't mean to offend you. But you're right. Showing you our anger will only drive you away again." She sighed. "But you have been missed. And not just as a detective. As a friend, by some more than others." She flashed an amused glance at Skulduggery. "But we do know what went on. You were watched over the whole time, whether you wanted it or not."

"What?" I asked, startled.

"You didn't think we'd leave you unprotected on American soil, did you? Or anywhere, for that matter? You were hurt, you were coping. But had you come to me, I'd have told you to get over it. You did what you had to do, you literally had no other choice. You told your family then just disappeared, they forgave you ages ago."

"They what?" I asked, dumbfounded.

Skulduggery sighed. "Valkyrie, had your family not had a phobia of magic passed down, your life would have went very differently. You would have had magic by the time we met, grew up in it, maybe none of what happened up til now would have happened. They have as much guilt in this as you do. Imagine a world where you wouldn't have needed a reflection, one in which our partnership didn't have to be some dirty secret." There was an edge to his voice and I didn't blame him.

I'd dreamed of that world, a lot. A world with no reflection, no hiding. My parents would have interfered a lot more, yeah, but in the end they helped save the world, didn't they?

"Well, now that that cheerful walk down memory lane is over, there are people who want to see you tomorrow. Tanith, Dexter and Saracen, namely. Your family knows to wait until your ready." China said gently and I nodded.

I still couldn't face them, not yet. I was back home, but facing them would have to wait.

* * *

I stayed at Skulduggery's house that night, slept in my old bed, or tried to. I wasn't going to be told about the case until tomorrow, not even Skulduggery knew what it was about. And in the morning he saw to coffee for me at least and tossed some cold Pop Tarts at me. The breakfast of champions.

He was silent on the ride to the Sanctuary and I wondered what he was thinking about. I was seriously hoping he'd forgotten what I blurted at him in the Accelerator room. I'd told him I loved him before and I'd realized right then, at that moment he didn't feel the same way for me. And strangely, I was OK with that. Maybe it was what I deserved for all the bad things I'd done in my life. "What's the matter?" I asked at last.

"Oh, nothing. Just thinking."

"About?"

"Lots of clever little things." He said and I smiled. "About you and me, our partnership."

"If you want another partner-"

"Don't be thick. It just scares me how much alike we are at times. You went off exactly the same way I would have done."

"But you told me not to!" I growled.

"Because I knew you needed to and you never do a thing I tell you to. Had I said 'Go, sort out your feelings' you would have stayed and made everyone miserable. And by everyone, I mean _me_. Having you gone was an utter relief."

"I missed you too, Skulduggery." I said and I sensed his smile behind his disguise. The facade had finally malfunctioned to the point of not being functional at all, so he'd had the sigils healed over and was back to his disguises. I actually liked him better that way but wasn't going to tell him.

We were meeting the others in the cafeteria, something I thought was odd, but then I guessed things had changed. Tanith was the first to me, squeezing me so tightly I thought she'd snap my spine. "Missed you." She whispered fiercely.

"Missed you too." I managed over the lump in my throat. Dex and Saracen were next, both seemed intent on hugging me tighter than Tanith had.

"Don't you ever go away from us, ever again." Dex growled softly. "Or I'll personally hunt you don't and kill you."

"Missed you too." I said and he smiled as we parted.

"Aw, lighten up, Dex." Saracen said cheerfully. "She's got Skul for a partner. I'd run away too if I had him with me every day."

"Shut up." Skulduggery said good-naturedly.

"Yes, boss." Saracen agreed, grinning hugely. It was good to be home, with them. My real family, in a way.

"So, what is the case about?" I asked and Dex shrugged.

"No idea," He said. "I'll grab us all some Cokes. We'll be waiting until her imperial majesty deigns to see us. From what I can gather there's a ferocious debate going on as to whether or not this mission is too dangerous for us."

Tanith snorted. "And I'm in on it, something China's just _thrilled_ with." She said, rolling her eyes. "But I'm not letting my little sis go anywhere without me." She said, giving my shoulder a gentle squeeze. So they knew, they all knew, but they were still speaking to me.

"Can anyone here keep their mouth shut? How many people know?" I asked.

"Pretty much everyone, Val. But you did the right thing, the only thing. If you hadn't the world would literally be over. You aren't the one who bonded your little sister to the Sceptre. We can thank your reflection for that. She wasn't as bright as she thought she was." Saracen said.

"Remember, Val. She had some of Darquesse in her as well. So it makes sense she did the one thing she thought would assure her a victory. And beneath it all, she was still murderous and dangerous. She wanted you to fail, even if it meant ending the world." Dex said.

"That's cheerful."I managed. We fell to small talk, finished our drinks and at last China sent for us. Tipstaff saw us up himself and it was an open secret that he fawned over China even more that he had over Erskine. He was also resistant to her magic, so it always amused me to know that underneath it all China was flustered at all his attentions. Someone was actually in love with her and she didn't know what to do with it.

China smiled as we entered the throne room. "Good of you all to show up." She said dryly and I repressed a sigh. She didn't like wherever she was sending us, and that didn't bode well for any of us. "It turns out that, to be short, there is life after death. Not the ghosts or other things we see here, but actual life after death. They get bodies and everything."

Skulduggery stared at her doubtfully. "And the Necropolis?"

"What do you expect from Necromancers? The only actual dead you saw there were your challengers." He nodded sharply as if he'd always expected that was the truth.

"And we have a chance to go on a rescue mission of sorts. Only there's a problem."

"Which is?" He asked, but I already knew what it was.

"You can only bring back two people. As you can imagine if word got out people would be beating our doors down to have their loved ones back home again. As it is, I've had to fight off many groups who would like to turn this to their advantage."

"How do we know they will even want to come back?" I asked and she shrugged elegantly.

"We don't. But there are rules. You will only be able to bring two people back, and it will only be the two people who should return. It may not even be anyone we know, it may be mortals for all we know." My heart sank. I was hoping she'd say it was Ghastly and Anton, we all were. Or Skulduggery's family.

"So. what's so dangerous about this mission?" Dex asked.

"The dead won't exactly be happy to see you. Their world is perfect, no pain, no illness, no sickness, and certainly no death. You may actually have to drag the two who are to be back here back kicking and screaming." China said. Then smiled like she secretly enjoyed the next part. "And there's every chance they will trap you in the afterlife forever."

"Well, that's cheery." Skulduggery said brightly. "So when do we go?"

* * *

 **OK, leaving it there for now, hope you enjoyed it!**


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Ghastly, Tanith, Billy-Ray, Anton, Kenspeckle, Gordon, Saracen, Hopeless, Larrikin, China or Corrival.

* * *

We'd all agreed since the underworld matched our world in many respects that we'd call on Ghastly first. I entered his shop alone, the others hoping seeing me would turn him to mush. Ghastly looked up at the bell and stood up in shock. "Val? Oh, sweetie, what are you doing here? You're too young." He came forward and hugged me tightly then pulled back. "You're alive, aren't you? Obviously they didn't send you alone. Where are the others?"

I murmured that they were outside and left to get Tanith. We all gave them time alone. I didn't know what we all expected, but I knew finding out Billy-Ray had been in love with her had changed things. My stomach flipped at the thought that he was down here somewhere too. What if he came looking for her?

Skulduggery and I exchanged glances and he nodded. "I wasn't going to mention that, but yes. Once word gets out we are here people, good and bad, may come calling, though most of the dead will shun us, as they should. We have no real place here, even if we do get trapped."

"I never thought of that." I admitted and he nodded again. I wanted to ask if he wanted to see his family again, he had to after all these centuries, but he seemed content to go in when Tanith at last opened the door. Ghaslty's collar looked rather rumpled and from the stupid smile on his face we all knew what they'd been up to. "Tea?" He offered and we all nodded.

"So," he said when we were all served, "you're here on a rescue mission, only you don't know who it is for or where to find them." He said and I nodded. "Sounds typical of the way the Sanctuary works. I take it you'd like some help?"

"You don't want to go back?" Tanith asked and Ghastly shrugged.

"Tanith, if I have to stay here I'll wait for you, you know that. Would I like to go back?" He shrugged again. "I'm honestly content here, but if I have more to do there so be it. Are we going for Anton next?" He asked and it was Skulduggery's turn to shrug.

"We honestly haven't a clue. Supposedly along our travels we will just meet the two people who are going back. The problem is we have no way of knowing who they are. You could be one and we wouldn't know it."

"Or it could be a bad guy." Ghastly said quietly.

* * *

That wasn't a happy thought, but he was right. And when we all set out in his van the next morning everyone was pretty quiet. Tanith sat in the front with Ghastly driving and Skulduggery and I sat in the back where he could keep an eye on things. "You've been pretty selfless, you know." He said gently and I looked at him, startled.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I said, but we both knew. I'd suggested after Anton we reunite Skulduggery with his family. There was nothing in the rules that didn't say he couldn't stay willingly.

* * *

Anton agreed to have the rest of us as guests while Skulduggery went on to see his family alone. Anton led me into the common room, his smile gentle as he joined me on the couch. "It's a noble thing you're doing, you know" He said and I nodded over the lump in my throat.

"Then why do I feel so terrible?"

"Love hurts." He said gently, then kept me quiet company for a while. The others were giving me space and I appreciated that, but I had to be strong. I didn't want Skulduggery giving up his family for me. He was my best friend, and as much as it hurt to admit he'd never be in love with me, I thought it was rather sweet he loved his wife that much.

I wondered as we all retired to our rooms that night if we'd ever see him again. And when two days had passed with no word we at last went to his old home. I had no intentions of knocking on the door, but Ghastly insisted. "Part of being a Dead Man is doing missions you'd rather not, Val. You're his partner and best friend, you just need to check on him so we can move on with the mission, that's all." I nodded.

I knocked on the door and at last a woman answered, a young child clinging to her leg. "Uh, hello." I managed. She was beautiful, amazingly so and I knew why Skulduggery still loved her. She moved suddenly and gripped me in a tight hug.

"Valkyrie Cain. Welcome. I've been waiting to meet you for a very long time."

"You have?" I asked and she nodded and smiled as she backed up.

"The dead are content here, we know we'll see those we love again eventually. And it was good to see Skulduggery again. To talk about old times." I blinked.

"He's been here and gone?" I asked.

"Yes, he hasn't returned to you? We realized we've changed, both of us. We still love one another dearly, but we are not in love. I expected he'd return to you."

"I expect the idiot's gotten himself captured." I said.

* * *

Back in the van we strategized. The Midnight Hotel could still take us anywhere, but since we didn't know where Skulduggery was that would be a problem. And the list of the dead who might do harm to Skulduggery was endless, though Anton assured us most of the dead just didn't care about those things. He shrugged. "We're beyond it, there's no point. We can have everything we desire here. I think he's gone missing again, like he's done before. That said, we search."

And we did, going everywhere we could think of, every country we knew of that he had a hideaway in the living world and still no Skulduggery. "Wouldn't it be stupid if he was at the pier." I said as we left yet another safe house.

The others looked at me, Saracen smiling slightly. "Spoken like a woman in love, Val."

"Like his partner." I snapped. But we all knew the truth. I was in love with him, but we had a skeleton to find and a case to solve, so all of that could wait until later. Though when we reached the pier the others hung back and let me go on alone. Skulduggery was there, waiting for me.

"Hello." He said as if he hadn't led us on a merry chase.

"Hello. We've been looking for you. I guess you needed time to think."

"I did. For centuries I thought that if there was an afterlife, and I'm still not convinced there is, that we'd all be together and nothing would have changed. But it has. I love my family very much, but I'm not in love with my wife anymore." He sounded shocked, and lost and sad.

"You could stay, you know. To be with them." I said, resisting the urge to hug him. He tilted his skull up at last to look at me and the misery and loneliness etched on his skeletal features melted my heart.

"I want to be with my best friend." He said in a broken whisper and it didn't matter anymore if he loved me or not. I gathered him in a tight hug and his bony arms wrapped around me, hugging me back just as tightly. "I missed you, when you didn't hug me until now, I thought-"

"You're thick as a brick, Skulduggery. I had to _earn_ the right to hug you."

He pulled away with a laugh. "Ah, the Irish. Willful and stubborn, stubborn and willful."

"Did you just loosely quote a horror movie?" I asked and he nodded proudly. "Nicely done. Come on then, we've got a world to save, because I'm assuming it ends if we fail."

"Most likely it does." He agreed.

* * *

We traveled on, meeting everyone we could think of, and still had no idea who we were supposed to rescue. Kenspeckle joined us, promising he'd figure out the answer with one of his inventions and he did by the time we returned to our starting point. "Excellent news." He said, looking at the device in his hands after scanning Ghastly and Anton. "You've found your two dead who should go back."

Anton frowned. "That makes no sense. We didn't die by accident. You wouldn't be cheating just to get rid of the Dead Men, would you?" He asked and Kenspeckle huffed, insulted.

A figure stepped out of the alleyway across from us, grinning broadly. "Now, now. It's how I would have written it, you know. Bring 'em all back and kill them all over again."

"Uncle Gordon!" I said and ran to him happily.

"How's my favorite niece?" He asked as he hugged me warmly. "You know the answer, Val. It's part of your new magic. Besides, they're Dead Men, they have more work to do." I looked at them, then him and back again.

"How do we do what I'm thinking of." I asked in a low voice and he grinned. "How do you think?" He handed me a satchel with four Echo Stones inside with a wink and a nod and we left for our world.

China demanded to see us, not very thrilled when I dropped the three dummy Echo Stones and they cracked open. A mist hovered above them, then grew into the shape of men. Corrival Deuce smiled at me. "Clever girl, clever uncle, clever us for cheating death."

"It wasn't so bad." Hopeless said and Larrikin nodded agreeably. China went ashen as the men stared at her coolly. She'd taken the family of one of our own and we weren't known to be forgiving.

* * *

 **Uh-oh. Sounds like the Grand Mage better invest in track shoes.**


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Ghastly, China, Anton, Tipstaff, Vile, Larrikin, Hopeless or Wreath.

* * *

Skulduggery cleared his throat and the men broke off eye contact. Ghastly grabbed my elbow and escorted me to his old office while the rest stayed behind to be debriefed. "Tea?" He asked and I nodded stiffly. "I'm sorry, for what it's worth."

"It's fine, I'm fine. But I'm thinking of going back to America, working for their Sanctuary. I can't stay here and have my nose rubbed in it, I'm not that good of a person."

"No one is. But will running help? It won't change how things are, Val. I know it hurts, I know that. But you're a Dead Man, and if the rest are back we are most likely needed." I slumped in a chair.

"Thanks for the guilt trip."

"You're quite welcome." He smiled faintly as he handed me my tea. "But if you really care about his happiness, you'll stay. He has to have enough guilt feelings as it is, considering."

"Considering what?" Skulduggery asked from the doorway. "What's going on? Valkyrie, you're white as a sheet, what is it?"

"She felt faint. And I told her it is normal considering the shift between worlds. Valkyrie would rather the other men didn't find out." I closed my eyes in relief and soon was swarmed with my fellow Dead Men most of whom were convinced I'd almost fainted.

China called to see me alone and I followed Tipstaff into her throne room. "Are you well? You're whiter as a sheet."

"I didn't take shifting back too well." I said and she frowned.

"That sounded like a lie. You wouldn't lie to your Grand Mage, would you?"

"Yes." She blinked then laughed.

"Valkyrie, I _am_ grateful to you for saving my life, you have nothing to fear from me."

"But, now that the others are back you'd be grateful if I just disappeared one day, right?"

"I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about."

"I'm only here because I'm an asset to you, nothing more. You don't have friends, you can't be trusted, you told me that yourself."

She frowned. "That's a lot colder than you normally are. A lot more ruthless and practical. I like it, yet I don't."

"I don't care what you like." I said, not much caring if I was fired.

China sighed. "I don't know what's bothering you, I truly don't. But if you want to leave, leave. No one will come looking for you this time, I'll see to that."

"That's the nicest thing you've ever done for me." I said and left.

I left the Sanctuary, knowing it was the wrong thing to do, but I couldn't help it. I wasn't a good person, I was a terrible person. China was a terrible person too, of course, but Skulduggery clearly loved her. And I couldn't stand to see her win. I wasn't strong enough or nice enough to be happy for them though I'd tried.

I was waiting for a taxi when Anton appeared at my elbow. "Not like one of us to cut and run. You aren't the team mascot or the token female, we need you." He put a gentle hand on my shoulder. "Your brothers are worried about you, Skulduggery is convinced you hate him. China is developing wrinkles as we speak. That's an awful lot of chaos to cause in one day." I laughed, I couldn't help it and he smiled and hugged me to him.

"Come back in. You're the only Dead Man I actually like." He said, so I did. Anton stayed by my side, an unsmiling looming buffer that kept all the others at bay and it looked like I had a new partner until I was strong enough to face Skulduggery again.

Skulduggery kept casting worried glances at me, coming as close as he dared, but we all knew Anton was the best fighter. He'd give Skulduggery a look and Skulduggery would wander off as if he'd had another destination in mind.

We were all staying at the Sanctuary that night, for no other reason than to be on call and I heard a tap on my windowpane. I ignored it. It came again and I sighed. I went to the window and drew back the curtain. Skulduggery was balanced on a ledge, tilting his head at me entreatingly. I let him in and got back into bed. "So you're sulking because I don't want further bloodshed, is that it?"

I shook my head and he continued. "Where does it end, Valkyrie? Does Ghastly get to kill me because of what Vile did?"

"I don't know." I said quietly. "Maybe he does. But you're right it would never end because I'd be expected to take vengeance for you, wouldn't I?"

"One could only hope." He said dryly. "Are we still partners, friends?"

"I don't know that either. I'm not like you, Skulduggery. I'm not logical or ruthless."

"Really? I was in the throne room and you gave China quite a few broadside shots. I've never seen anyone dare show that much anger in front of her. She does care about you in her own twisted way, but you're right, she's not to be trusted."

"Then why did you save her?"

"She's useful."

"Wow, you _are_ ruthless."

"And so are you. So why don't we two ruthless creatures go get something in the cafeteria? I noticed you didn't eat all day."

"As long as we both admit why I really got angry. I- I'm happy for both of you, I just don't want to see you get hurt." I said quietly.

"What are you talking about? If you think I have something going on with China you're mistaken. I might be a Dead Man but I'm not downright suicidal. Though that wouldn't be a bad way to go, eh?" He asked cheerfully as he sat on the bed and elbowed me softly.

"Moron." I said fondly. I allowed him to coax me down to eat, thankful I hadn't cried and he hadn't told me how he felt towards me. I knew he didn't love me, and I'd just have to learn to live with it the best I could.

In the morning I had breakfast with the others then was content to explore with Hopeless and Larrikin for bonding time. But China wanted to see me in her apartment so I went alone, wary of what she wanted. "You look better, my dear. You slept well? Please, come sit." She said, and I did, accepting the coffee Tipstaff brought me.

"America changed you, being on your own changed you. It made your harder, more self-reliant. That's both good and bad."

"What's bad about it? Everyone around me is ruthless."

"True, but you used to be the one we could count on for balance. The one who showed mercy, even when people didn't deserve it." I knew she meant herself and I shrugged. "Do you really despise me that much?"

"Not really, but you tend to break your toys, even the ones you claim to like." I said carefully and she gave me a fragile smile.

"Then it's come so soon, has it? The day you took my advice and stopped trusting me, stopped being my friend?"

"I am your friend, probably the only one you have left. That doesn't mean I have to like you."

"You have grown cold. Maybe too cold. I never thought I'd see the day you turned your back on Skulduggery, no matter what he did."

"You want unconditional love, get religion." I said and her lips twitched then we both laughed. We both knew we couldn't have him, that neither one of us would ever win. "I'm still not sure why I left America, lots of cute guys there." I said and she grinned for once.

"Let me order in some food. We both know we lost, and now we can plot against him." I giggled and nodded. China was my friend, as dangerous and stupid as that was. We'd just been fighting over the same toy and as long as she knew I wasn't interested in the same toy, we were safe.

So we chatted for hours, though I kept my guard up. China was social when it suited her and she was ambitious. "Since we both know he doesn't love us we could form a club, invite Eliza to join." I said and China snorted laughter, then covered up her mouth, her delicate cheeks going bright red.

"And half the other women he meets. Why can we ever like nice men, Valkyrie?"

"Nice men are boring."

"Agreed. Well, I suppose I can go sit on that stupid throne for a few more hours and look pretty. It's a hard job but someone has to do it."

I left, wondering what the lunch had really been about.

* * *

When I found Tanith in a training room she frowned. "Not like her to get chummy with other women, watch your back, Val. And now that you've loved and lost you're ready to move on to bigger and better things. Plenty of fish in the sea."

"Don't mention fish. Or chips. She only fed me those tiny dainty tea sandwiches. The kind with air between two pieces of bread?"

"Oh, those are good, if you get plenty that is. Let's go get a bite to eat then. We can take my bike." I agreed and soon we were zooming down the streets at breakneck speeds. It felt good to get out, but I couldn't get the thought out of my mind that I'd betrayed Skulduggery somehow.

Tanith swatted me when we were settled in front of two baskets of fish and chips. "Hey! Don't go feeling sorry for yourself, plenty of fish in the sea. What about Wreath? He always seems to show up when you need him the most."

"Ew. He was my teacher, and just, ew. I can't believe you'd let me date a Necromancer."

"Always nice to know where I stand in my students' hearts. And she's right, ew." I looked over and Solomon Wreath was standing beside our booth. I got up and hugged him.

"Solomon! What are you doing here?"

"Come to check up on my favorite student. I got wind of your adventure into the underworld. Technically we in the temples believe you were all dead. Perhaps it recharged your Necromancy powers?"

"I don't think so."

"I'll escort you back to the Sanctuary and give you permission to use my cane. I'd like to see you reenter the fold, Valkyrie. There will be some waves, but your place is in a temple, not with the Dead Men." Tanith just stared at him in shock and Solomon shrugged. "I'll admit it's personal, I'd rather see her bored to death in a temple than bleeding to death in the street and we all know the Dead Men have a nasty habit of dying."

* * *

 **Well, well, well. Solomon popped in and wants to take Valkyrie to a temple. I may or may not have taken liberties, but this is fiction, you know.**


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Wreath, Serpine, China, Fletcher, Darquesse, Ghastly or Tanith.

* * *

Skulduggery looked ready to explode with rage when he found Wreath with me in a training room. "Valkyrie, step away from him." He said his voice low and dangerous.

Wreath smiled thinly. "Tell me, Detective. Why is it you were in such a hurry to get vengeance against Serpine, but yet the Grand Mage lives and breathes? Couldn't be that you love her, could it?" Skulduggery's gun sprang into his hand and as he thumbed back the hammer I stepped between them.

"Move, Valkyrie." He rasped.

"No. Would you be that angry if it weren't true?" I asked quietly and his head rocked back as if I'd slapped him.

"Is that what you think?"

"I thought there had been enough vengeance. At least there is where China is concerned. You still love her, Skulduggery, and I'm fine with that. You're the one who has to come to terms with it." Skulduggery looked at me, spun on his heel and left.

Solomon just shrugged. "I doubt he'll kill her, but you've given the man food for thought. Just don't bring it up again. I know he can do no wrong in your eyes, Valkyrie, but he's a dangerous man."

"I didn't mean for him to go after her."

"And he won't." Solomon soothed. "But he'll avoid you until he's calmed down. No insult meant, but had a man said to him what you just did he'd either have shot him or set him on fire." I sighed and took off after Skulduggery. I found him in the library, looking out sightlessly over the town.

"Skulduggery, I'm sorry, but Wreath has a point. You only seem to get around to vengeance with people you weren't involved with."

"Duly noted. Should I go on a killing spree, Valkyrie? Will that make you happy?" He asked tensely.

"Only if I get to go with you." I said and he bundled me in a tight hug.

"Thank you. I would have shot him. And he was right. Part of what China did to my family was out of revenge, no matter what else she says. So I've always felt just as guilty."

"So if Fletcher goes crazy and kills you one day I'm also to blame? Lovely, that."

Skulduggery titled his head in a slight frown. "No, that would be Fletcher's fault entirely. Oh, I see. Still, I'd rather you avoided Wreath if it's all the same and yes, I realize that's unfair of me. I work every day with China yet I won't let you see Wreath." He sighed.

"You won't let me?" I growled. "Who made you the boss of me? God, Wreath was right, I'd be better off in a temple. Why don't you go fawn over China?" I sneered. Skulduggery cringed like I'd hit him and I stormed out of the library.

It wasn't right or fair to keep getting angry with him, but I couldn't help it. If he just admitted he loved China and wanted a relationship with her maybe I wouldn't have to keep walking on eggshells around her.

* * *

Wreath looked at me when I returned. "I give you my permission to use this, Valkyrie. I suggest you aim for Skulduggery's head." He added sweetly. I glanced over to see Skulduggery in the doorway and was tempted to.

Instead I aimed at a target Wreath had set up at the far end and shadows shot out of the cane, destroying it. "Welcome back, Valkyrie Cain." Wreath said, stepping back into a formal bow. "I'll have a ring forged for you. Power can never be completely drained, just copied if you'd like. I'll see you soon, try to stay alive in the meantime." He went to step past Skulduggery who blocked the doorway.

Wreath smiled thinly. "You're being childish. I have no idea what she sees in you."

"I don't like you and I don't trust you."

"The feelings are mutual, Detective. If you truly cared for your partner you'd let me take her to a temple and keep her safe."

"She's a Dead Man, she doesn't need coddling in a temple."

"Have you ever let her decide? Tell me, Detective. Did Valkyrie return to Ireland because she wanted to or because you needed her to? I've never understood your unhealthy obsession with her. You clearly don't love her, yet you refuse to let her go so another man can." Wreath snapped.

"Are you saying you're that man?" Skulduggery growled dangerously. His gun flew into his hand and he pressed the muzzle against Wreath's temple. "You don't get to love her. You haven't earned the right to love her."

"I stand corrected, you do love her." Wreath said calmly. He broke eye contact to look at me and sighed. "Try to live through the evening. I'll return as soon as possible." He tipped his cane towards me in a salute and disappeared in a swirl of shadows.

"What was that all about?" I asked and Skulduggery looked at me calmly as he holstered his gun.

"Hmm? Oh, nothing."

"You didn't get that angry before because you love China. You got that angry because you love me, didn't you?" I asked, stepping closer.

"Nonsense. I'm your mentor. It wouldn't be appropriate."

"You are not my mentor!"

"So you say, and yet I am."

"Skulduggery!"

"Fine, yes, I love you, all right? Are you happy now? I love a woman who will never love me in return. Aren't you _thrilled_ beyond words?"

"Lord, you're thick." Ghastly said as he entered the room, trailed by Tanith. "Doesn't love you? She's the only person on the planet who actually does. Or hasn't she told you that often enough to penetrate that thick skull of yours?"

"What's going on? We heard shouting." Tanith asked and I grinned at her.

"Skulduggery lost it and almost killed Wreath, it was awesome."

Skulduggery stared at me. "You have a strange idea of awesome." He said doubtfully. "Five minutes ago you wanted to run away to a temple with him." The other Dead Men were trailing in behind him, each more interested that the last in what was going on.

"Skulduggery tried to kill Wreath." Tanith announced happily.

"I did not. If I had _tried_ he'd be dead by now. I threatened, there's a difference."

"I wasn't running away, Skulduggery. If we're all back wouldn't Necromancy come in useful?"

"Yes, I suppose."

"And it isn't like I can go psycho bonkers crazy and become Darquesse anymore, is it?"

"True."

"So I did what you would do. I went for whatever we can get. Admit it, you're proud of me."

He sighed. "I'm annoyed with you. Why didn't you just tell me all this in the first place?"

"Before or after you and Wreath started fighting?"

"Point taken. And yes, I love you. Happy now?"

"Very."

Skulduggery tilted his head in a smile and pecked me affectionately on the cheek then leaned in closer to whisper in my ear. "And if you're a very good partner and stay by my side there's more of that later." He pulled back to look at me smugly and sauntered out of the room.

* * *

 **Naughty skeleton.**


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, China, Anton, Tipstaff, Corrival, Saracen, Ghastly, Vile or Erskine.

* * *

Skulduggery agreed that since China most likely had spies everywhere we stayed together or I stayed with a Dead Man at all times. "When you both thought I didn't love you you were safe with her and there's no use pretending I don't, so you stay with one of us at all times." He said over dinner and I nodded.

Which also meant he'd be meditating in my room, and that was different now. A lot different since he titled his head at me in a smile as he settled into a chair. "We need to have The Talk."

"Um, if it is the birds and the bees one, I know all about that. If it is the 'one of us might not come back from this' we have that talk all the time."

"No, this is more along the lines about us, about being together. I haven't been with anyone since I died, I haven't cared to. But obviously things are different now."

"Obviously." I said and I swore he blushed.

"And well, I am made out of bone, Valkyrie. It isn't going to be comfortable for you, you know that, right?"

I shrugged. "We'll figure out something."

"Fair enough." He looked away nervously. I knew he wanted to say more but being a gentleman was stopping him.

"Come on." I patted the bed.

"Valkyrie, that's hardly proper."

"Who said you get to get under the covers?" I asked and he smiled and clambered in beside me, lying down stiffly. "I'm not going to eat you, relax."

He nodded, tossing his hat to the chair and settled in. I sensed he'd closed what passed for his eyes. "This is nice." He murmured. "But aren't you tempted?"

"Of course I am, but- Skulduggery, I don't know how to ask this, but, aren't you worried I'll pull you apart?" I asked, blushing furiously. He turned his head to look at me and started laughing.

"I'm sorry, Valkyrie, but is that what you think will happen? You'll pull me apart? Being Lord Vile has it's uses, don't you worry about me." I swore he leered at me and I blushed again. "Come on then, try cuddling up. We might as well see now if we can do this."

I smiled and cuddled in. He was hard, being a skeleton, but his suit offered a little comfort and it wasn't too bad. I shifted slightly to rest my head on his shoulder and he grunted. "Feels nice. You make me wish I had skin again, something warm for you." I giggled. "I didn't mean it like that, God."

"Skulduggery?"

"Hmm?"

"You could get under the covers. You'd be warmer."

"I don't feel heat and cold."

"Liar." He sighed good naturedly and got underneath the covers with me. "There, better, right?" I asked cuddling in again.

"Very. You do know the amount of temptation you're putting in front of me right now?"

"I also know you're a gentleman."

"I'm not _that_ much of a gentleman." He teased.

"Skulduggery!" I yelped, sitting up and away from him and he laughed, then crooked a finger to call me back to him. He smiled playfully, tilting his head and I went and cuddled back in.

Skulduggery held me close, stroking my hair, then tilted my chin up to face him. He looked at me tenderly then placed a chaste kiss on my forehead. He gestured and the lights went out and I cuddled in and drifted to sleep, well aware we hadn't really even kissed yet.

* * *

The next morning all the Dead Men were restless. Since we had no idea if there even was a threat many of us wanted to leave, at least for the day. Anton leaned over to me in line for breakfast. "I say we all go to the Midnight Hotel and disappear forever." He murmured and I grinned. For someone who ran a hotel he couldn't stand being this close to a town full of mages.

"Why don't we? It isn't like the Dead Men ever listen. Though you'd be short of rooms for guests." I said as we walked back to our table with our breakfast trays.

"Why don't we what?" Skulduggery asked, then looked amused at the suggestion. "If I thought you were serious, Anton, I'd say we go. If Corrival had no problem with it, of course."

Corrival waved a lazy hand. "As long as I have my cakes and puzzles I'm content. Why don't we suggest it? We will be out from underfoot and we can take up as little room as possible. Though it means having three or four roommates, of course." We all agreed and it was settled.

Anton was relieved to be out of the Sanctuary, we all were, and China was happy to see us go. I didn't miss the look she gave to Tipstaff and I was happy for her. As brokenhearted as I would have been in her place I'd have moved on too. She'd warned me to be careful when I'd seen her alone earlier that day, then shrugged. "It isn't jealously. Believe it or not, I'm happy for you. Skulduggery just seems to have a problem knowing what he wants. He hurt me, and I've already warned him if history repeats itself I'll kill him."

I thought of her words as we clambered into the Bentley to follow Ghastly's van and the rest of the Dead Men. She was right, he could hurt me, or I could hurt him. We both knew we had pasts we weren't exactly proud of and that loyalty would take effort on both our parts. "Penny for your thoughts."

"China told me she threatened you."

"She did. She cares about you. She doesn't want to see you hurt the way I hurt her, and she won't. I've changed, Valkyrie, back then, and to be truthful, even now, if it were any woman but you-" He shrugged.

"I see. I'd yell at you, but I'm not any better. What's wrong with us?"

"Nothing, we just give into temptation where others resist. Or we take 'good enough for now' and trade in for a better model later, but that's not what I'm doing with you. Which is why I've been in such a bad mood lately, sorry."

"It's OK. Dating the man formerly known as Lord Vile is bound to be an adventure." I teased and I sensed his smile behind his disguise.

We traveled slow, stopping for lunch. We were out in the real world again, the world of mortals and most of us were reveling in it, except for poor Anton. He just glared at them whenever they got too close. Though he did laugh when I told one woman we were reverse Mormons and they were all my husbands.

Soon enough we reached the Midnight Hotel. Anton looked at it and frowned. He went to go in but Saracen leapt in front of him and tackled him to the ground. "Everyone down, bomb!" He roared and as we all dove to the ground the Midnight Hotel exploded outwards, the fragments flying in all directions.

Skulduggery and Ghastly managed to raise shields of air to protect us as debris flew past like shrapnel and flames and further explosions sent shockwaves through the ground. I heard a crash and looked back to see a beam had wedged itself in the windscreen of Ghastly's van. I winced, but kept down, hoping there were no further surprises awaiting us.

There was smoke and fire, making it hard to see and Skulduggery was the first up, using his Elemental powers to combat the smoke and flames.

Ghastly joined him and I did what I could though I was rusty. Still they smiled at me to see me using my old magic again. The fire out we looked at the dismal ruins. "I'd say someone wants the Dead Men truly dead." Skulduggery murmured. We all nodded. "Sorry about your hotel, Anton." He said turning to him and Anton shrugged.

I thought he was in shock but he took a small device out of his pocket and we watched as the charred and smoking ruined disappeared and the Midnight Hotel reformed. "Magic comes in handy." He said looking at me then led the way in.

I caught Skulduggery's eye once we were in and he shrugged. I knew things could be replicated by magic, but a whole hotel?

Corrival got our attention and we all gathered in the common room. "Obviously someone wants us all gone, and they knew we were headed here. Ideas?"

"It could have been meant just for Anton." Skulduggery pointed out.

"True, but if they take out Anton and our transportation they know we'd hunker back down in the Sanctuary, anyone would."

"So the Sanctuary's the next target?" I asked and he nodded.

"Exactly, Valkyrie." Skulduggery said with a pleased nod and stepped away to make calls. When he returned he informed us we were under orders to remain in the Midnight Hotel. "I have to agree with China for once. Whoever this coward is and whomever the target was, I doubt he will sneak back in with all of us here and try planting a bomb again. That said, we stay alert."

He turned to Anton. "No insult meant, old friend, but how did they bypass security?"

"I'd like to know that myself." Anton said grimly and the three of us went out to check the magic protecting the Hotel.

"Feel here, Valkyrie. You can feel where the magic protected the previous Midnight Hotel." Skulduggery said and I felt the air, feeling a slight tingle. He took his rainbow coloured powder from his pocket and tossed it in the air where the old magic was. It turned colours to show the hotel's magic, then nothing.

Anton who was also feeling the energy and examining the sigils frowned. "It's no use. Perhaps the ruins would have yielded more clues, but I was furious and not thinking clearly, you have my apologies."

"None needed." Skulduggery said kindly. "You've been gone for years, Anton. So either this trap is from before and we just activated it, or-" He shrugged. We were all puzzled. I had no idea what had happened to the Midnight Hotel after Anton's death, I'd always assumed a new owner had taken over. It was sad to think of it standing there neglected all these years, sadder still to think of what would have happened if Anton and Saracen hadn't sensed something was wrong.

* * *

 **Boom! And the Midnight Hotel goes up in flames. Was it a last-resort attempt by Erskine to ensure the death of Anton, or are there others out there who want the Dead Men out of the way?**


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Anton, Saracen, Ghastly, Dex, Corrival, Larrikin, Hopeless, Erskine, Tanith, Billy-Ray, Lord Vile or Serpine.

* * *

Since Anton had no actual guests and saw no need to get any right away we had the hotel to ourselves. Plans changed and Skulduggery and I got a room alone. Mainly because he'd taken to pacing and spinning the chamber of his revolver while he hummed to himself. He looked beyond pleased when we were encouraged to go settle into our room rather early. "You see? Act crazy enough and people will leave you be. Now then." He held out his arms and I went to him, happily melting into his ribcage. "That's better. I'll terrorize the others into getting you something to eat, what would you like?" He offered.

"Whatever they're having is fine. I wish we were home though. We could sleep in tomorrow."

"Mm. So do I. I want to be alone with you, more than we can be here." He caressed my face with a gloved hand and tilted his head in a smile. "You're very beautiful. Have I told you that lately?"

"I don't think so. You forgot to add how handsome and dashing you are."

"Well of course I am, I'm _me_." He said, but there was a catch in his voice. Skulduggery left to terrify the others into feeding me, mostly because he enjoyed terrorizing people and returned. He cocked his head at me. "Did you mean what you said right now? That I'm actually handsome to you?"

"Of course I did." I walked closer to touch his cheekbone gently and he closed what passed for his eyes. "What's the matter?"

"I- I've never gotten used to the screams. When people see me-" I pulled him down into a kiss, startling us both, but I had to. Skulduggery Pleasant was the man I loved and he needed to know that. My lips met his teeth and I was surprised by their smoothness, by his willingness to adjust his head to meet my lips more fully.

He grunted happily, cradling my head in one hand while the other went to my waist. I wrapped my arms around his neck and was about to take the kiss deeper when there was a knock on the door. "Food's here, Val." Saracen called gleefully and I realized he knew what we were doing. I broke off the kiss with a giggle and Skulduggery made an amused sound.

We rejoined the others, Saracen looking at us all too innocently. "Hope fast food is OK with you, Val. Ghastly had already left and been on his way back by the time Skulduggery showed up to bark orders."

"But your van?" I asked in pity and he shrugged.

"Anton lent me his car. On _purpose_." Anton just looked amused as he sat beside Larrikin and Hopeless and I didn't ask why. He was rarely what I'd called playful so it was good to see him having fun. He caught me looking at him and smiled.

"Skulduggery got the car used when the owner left for America and put it up for sale. I think it's rather charming." His lips twitched.

"But we just saw the hotel blow up, you were able to restore that too?"

He nodded. "Skulduggery thought it was a worthwhile investment because the owner would one day miss it. He decided to store it here. It's utterly charming, Val. Bright orange with a green interior."

I blinked, "You bought the Oompa-Loompa and made Ghastly drive it? Tell me someone got photos, please?" Ghastly groaned as Dex and Saracen whipped out their mobiles. I snorted laugher then looked at Ghastly. "Sorry, you look perfectly lovely."

He snorted in amusement. "Of course I do. But it isn't a bad little car, all things considered. Paint it black, get a red interior."

"Black interior and we can rename it KITT." I suggested and he smiled. He didn't mind being teased as long as it was in a friendly way and I helped him clean up after. "Are you OK? Your van-"

"It's just a van, sweetie. Besides, since coming back I've been shopping around. I think it's kind of obvious how Tanith and I feel for one another and I'm thinking ahead."

I squealed then hugged him. "Congratulations, and I mean that. You both deserve to be happy."

"So do you, things are going well, I take it." I nodded but he caught my hesitation. "It's tough on him, Val. Being a skeleton is usually a point of pride for him until it comes to you, then he's unsure of himself."

"No, I'm not." Skulduggery lied as he joined us. "What fun am I missing out on?" He asked, then titled his head in a smile when Ghastly told him the good news.

"Good. You treat her well or I'll let Valkyrie deal with you." He said, ruffling my hair fondly. " I laughed and ducked, batting his hand away. I froze suddenly, looking out the window. A figure was there for a split second, tapping on the glass with his straight razor and staring at me from behind his sunglasses. "What?" Skulduggery asked sharply, but we were all already headed to the front door.

"Billy-Ray." I muttered.

* * *

We searched outside, finding no trace of him. We returned inside and I knew some of the Dead Men doubted I had saw him, but Skulduggery believed me and that was all that mattered. "I think that explains our explosion, though it isn't his usual style."

"Maybe it was a warning. He didn't hold Tanith to loving him after she came back, but-" I shrugged and he nodded. Billy-Ray had died to protect Tanith, he loved her that much. True, it had been a Remnant-possessed Tanith and she'd rejected him once the Remnant was removed, but he'd still been in love with her. "I feel sorry for him, in a way."

"I don't." Ghastly said as he joined us at the table in the common room. "How would he even know we were coming out here? And why not stay near Tanith?"

Anton joined us. "Have we ever considered that when Skulduggery and Valkyrie cheated to increase our numbers it opened a gateway of sorts to let some balance back into the universe? Five of us, five of them."

Skulduggery and I exchanged guilty glances. "If you're right, Anton, the good news is Erskine isn't coming back." Skulduggery said and Anton smiled faintly.

"But imagine who the other four could be. Who would wield enough power to make Billy-Ray hop to?"

I went icy cold suddenly and gripped the table as a vision flooded me. I hissed and gripped the table tighter, my fingernails digging in. The pain increased until I thought my head would explode and I couldn't help screaming in agony as the man in my vision smiled and blew me a kiss. I felt hands on my shoulders and realized Saracen had rushed in followed by the others. "It can't be. It wasn't him." I managed.

"I felt it too, Val. It was him." I winced, not wanting to tell Skulduggery the bad news, but I couldn't get those glittering emerald eyes out of my head, or the strange desire that had burned in them.

At last my breathing slowed and I looked up at Skulduggery to smile at him weakly. "You don't have to say it, this is my fault, for cheating."

"What is?"

"Serpine, he's back." I expected Skulduggery to go into an immediate rage, but strangely, he didn't.

"Then he's coming for you. If he can't seduce you out of my arms, he'll kill you." He said grimly.

* * *

After the shock of two attacks in one day had died down Corrival ordered that we all sleep in one room and I was to be watched by a guard constantly. I didn't dare object and watched as Skulduggery joined him to discuss battle plans. Anton watched them and sighed. "It isn't the same, not without Erskine."

"I thought you'd be the last person to want to see him."

"I'm a Dead Man. I'll do what needs to be done to win the battle. Speaking of which, that lunatic Serpine has been doing all this to woo you. To show you who the real general is. Oh, I know the truth, we all do at this point. But as I said the dead are beyond that." He shrugged and we both watched Skulduggery, wondering if and when Vile would emerge to destroy Serpine once and for all.

* * *

 **Goodness, this story is getting a tad violent, isn't it? But lucky Val, a lunatic who wants to end the world adores her. Or wants to kill her. It's one of the two. Oh, what if he really is in love with her? I'm going to have so much fun with this!**


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Serpine, Anton, Corrival, Darquesse, China, the Faceless Ones or Lord Vile.

* * *

Serpine was in my dreams that night, dressed in his normal suit and wearing the black glove that frightened people who knew what it hid underneath. He smiled at me and came close enough to caress my face, trailing his fingers down to my collarbone. I shivered at his touch, and he made a soothing sound. "Hello, my dear child. It's been far too long, hasn't it, my sweet Valkyrie?"

"It has." I managed, wondering why I didn't feel like fighting back. Why I hoped Nefarian Serpine of all men would touch me again. He walked around me, his gloved hand caressing my hair, ghosting across my cheekbone.

"You've only grown more beautiful. Please, sit." He gestured and a table appeared in the otherwise empty room we were in. I sat as he held my chair for me, murmuring my thanks when he gently pushed it in.

Serpine sat himself and looked across the table at me. "I know you've heard this in a thousand horror movies and fantasy novels, but the dead watch the living. And I've been keeping a close eye on you. Very close, and I saw the fight with Vile."

"I had no other choice."

"So you say, and yet, _he_ did. Do you know what really happened, my dear? He saw an empty vessel and he filled it before anyone else could." I shook my head, he had to be wrong. "Oh, yes, he did. Haven't you noticed sudden unexplained rages, a voice whispering in your head, even after Darquesse departed?" I went ashen and he nodded.

"A dead man infected a living woman with his magic, with his essence. He had so much hate and rage that he needed to share it with someone. He's seen you twice before, the third time he intends to take you as his, what is it Skulduggery calls you?" He frowned. "No matter, but he plans to rule his world, with you as his second in command."

"And you agree with that plan?" I asked doubtfully.

"Heaven's no. Being dead changes your perspective on things. I see the Faceless Ones for what they are and no longer desire them in this world. But I do desire you. I love you, Valkyrie. Just as I loved and was enraptured by the first woman he took from me."

"His wife."

"Oh, yes. She was mine first, until he seduced her away, but you always knew it was personal, a part of you did. She was to be my wife."

"Then why return? She's a free woman now."

"She'd drive me away. But you wouldn't, would you? Not as your shadow skin starts to grow, not as you start to feel the first shivers of his armour, not when you are the female version of him. It's lain dormant these last five years, Valkyrie Cain, waiting for you to die and live again as he did to trigger it. You have two weeks, at most."

"Why tell me all this if I don't have any hope?"

"Because when he rejects you, and he will, I'll be waiting for you."

I woke up just as the sun rose, and Anton looked over at me from where he kept watch. "Good morning, Valkyrie."

"Morning. Can I talk to you later, alone?" I asked and he nodded. I went and got showered and dressed. I didn't trust Serpine, and I knew I'd have to tell Skulduggery, rejection or no rejection. Another Lord Vile on our side wouldn't be a bad thing, I guessed. Though I was going to insist on being called a Lady.

Anton listened attentively after breakfast as I helped him clean up to cover our conversation. "I thought as much. Yes, you were all dead, a charming detail China left out because she knew Skulduggery would never have let you go."

"Are you saying she knew?"

"She may have, and you becoming a homicidal maniac in armour may be her ultimate goal. But it is also ours. Whatever you become, even if you become a second Vile, you'll still be a Dead Man." He hugged me, then led me out to tell the others.

Skulduggery looked calm and tilted his head thoughtfully at me. "It makes as much sense as anything else. I'm not about to send my mirror image out into the cold, Valkyrie. If he's right, if you do become my double it won't change how I feel for you."

Corrival frowned. "It isn't like Serpine to make tactical errors, he's given us a weapon. He used shock and awe then spoke honeyed words to Valkyrie. I don't like it. If that maniac is in love with her, however, we can use it to our advantage. Val, I want you to be smart. If he comes for you, go. If you're becoming Vile the best place for you is beside him."

Skulduggery nodded with a grin. "We insist."

No further attacks came and Skulduggery grinned at me as we all bedded down that night. Nothing had changed to alert Serpine, but if he attacked to take me we'd put up a token struggle. Nothing could hold back Vile's power when he manifested, and if Serpine thought he'd be able to tame Vile of all people he was mistaken.

 _Good._ Whispered the voice in my head. _Now you know._

* * *

Im my dreams that night it wasn't Serpine that came to me, but Lord Vile. We were on a barren wasteland strewn with bodies and it took me a while to realize it was a battlefield he'd swept through. _This is what you are. Embrace it._

"If I do, how do I make it work, Lord Vile? You were never a mindless killing machine, no matter how much rage you had in you."

He looked at me thoughtfully. _Give into the rage, release it on your target, it is possible. Be my fury, be my living armour. Lay waste to those who deserve it._

I woke up shortly after, dismayed to see my shadow skin briefly appear then retreat. I sighed. To remove Vile's influence would kill me, we all knew that. His magic had been what helped me survive the blast. And now it was racing through me, making me over and I was letting it happen because we needed it to.

One Vile would be more than enough for Serpine, but two? Two could destroy him and anything else that stood in their way. I realized then I needed Skulduggery to train me. I couldn't let the whispering maniac in my head take over without his voice there to balance him out.

"I wondered when you'd ask." He said gently. "But you know it isn't me you need. You have to face your demons, take your training from him. Remember he loves you, so that will make him go easier on you. Maybe." He tilted his head in a grin and we agreed to practice that night behind the hotel.

I waited there in the moonlight, my own shadows massing around me, wondering if Vile would simply attack and kill me. He appeared at last a distance away, his shadows writhing around him. He nodded gravely to me and approached. I held my ground, feeling my own armour wanting to emerge. But it wasn't ready to, not yet.

Lord Vile stopped in front of me and raised a gauntleted hand to touch my shadow skin. My shadows recognized his, leapt up and met them, twining around them. He withdrew his hand and looked at me. Waiting.

* * *

 **Yeah, there's nothing scary about Lord Vile training you. He'll probably give Val flying lessons. Straight down.**


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Lord Vile, Darquesse, Serpine, Ghastly, Dexter, Saracen or Gordon.

* * *

I stared at Lord Vile, feeling my mouth go dry. He wasn't attacking, just staring at me, and somehow that was a lot worse. I just hoped there was enough of Skulduggery left in him that he didn't swat me off the face of the planet.

I tried making my shadow skin become full armour, but it wouldn't, not yet. What did happen was that my skin just seemed to fade away and when I glanced down I could see the bones of my hands. I yelped and jumped back in dismay and actually heard Lord Vile laugh. "It is so not funny!" I growled. "I'm a skeleton!" I wailed, waving my arms in a frantic attempt to bring my skin back.

 _Calm down._

"You calm down. You aren't the one who is nothing but bones!" I growled and he tilted his head in amusement. "Sorry. I know we should be getting ready for the battle ahead but I can't. I mean look at me, I'm hideous." That was apparently the wrong thing to say. Lord Vile launched a wave of shadows at me, knocking me backwards.

I tried calling on my light magic, whatever the heck it was, people guessed lighting, and got off a feeble pulse his shadows just absorbed it as he stalked towards where I lay. I groaned and tried to lash out with my shadows. "No skin, that really hurt." I growled through gritted teeth.

 _Cry me a river._

I staggered to my feet to glare at him. "You know I'm not ready to fight you yet. So just do it, kill me."

 _So you think Serpine cares if you're ready? Do you think he'll play fair?_

"I liked you better when you didn't talk." I wheezed, but straightened up. He was giving me time Serpine wouldn't, going easy on me, even if every bone in my skeletal frame ached. I tried feeling the magic coming up through my bones, drew my shadows to me and let them build.

 _You're too slow._ Vile gestured and I was knocked back off my feet again. I was really starting to loose my temper and when he lashed me with a whip of shadows my rage exploded. I launched myself off the ground using my shadows and ran straight for him my shadow skin hardening as I launched a fist swirling with shadows right into his face. Vile brought up a shield of shadows at the last second and an explosion of pain ran up my arm.

But I couldn't let up. I gestured with my good arm, trying the manipulate his shadows and he merely used them to pick me up and toss me backwards.

 _Darquesse was a lot more fun to fight with. Right now you fight like Serpine._

"And he can't fight worth a damn." I groaned and Vile nodded. He lifted me off the ground with his shadows, tilted his head at me then was gone. I managed to stagger back into the hotel and the Dead Men did their best to ignore a skeleton in her shadow skin weaving drunkenly towards her room.

Skulduggery was waiting there for me and tossed me a healing rock. "Get a bath." He said evenly. I sighed and went in. I hated being his partner sometimes. A nicer partner would have held me to him and told me everything was going to be all right. He would have felt sorry for me for being a skeleton.

I pitied myself as the hot water ran, then dropped the rock in and shed my clothes before getting in. The water bubbled around me, soothing my aching bones. I put a hot washcloth across my face, well, the front of my skull, and sighed as the healing waters took the pain away.

There was a knock on the door, then Skulduggery's voice. "The important thing to remember is that you survived."

"Why did I?"

"Vile loves you. Even if you do seem to think he's rather hideous." There was an edge to his voice.

"What? No, _I'm_ hideous. I'm supposed to look like, well, me. Not this. People can't see me like this, Skulduggery."

"I'm coming in." His voice was softer and I drew the shower curtain closed for the sake of decency, even though I guessed I was being silly. "Good, you still have a sense of self respect. You're still a woman, Valkyrie. You're just a better one now. Much cheaper to be married to and still very beautiful."

"Did you just propose? That was sweet of you."

"You're my dream girl, you know that."

I poked my head out to stare at him. "You're serious?"

"Yes, I am. And there are full body facades if it bothers you that much, but I find you a lot more attractive this way to be honest."

"You're a strange man."

"Skeleton." He leaned forward and pecked me affectionately on the teeth. "And now that I know I am rather handsome and dashing to you I suspect Lord Vile will be in a better mood tomorrow night."

"We can only hope." I said and he tilted his head in a grin.

* * *

It was weird getting up the next morning and not having breakfast. I couldn't tell if I was still hungry or not, but I did watch the others eat with fascination. I sighed as they tore into pastries and Saracen flashed me an apologetic smile. "Look at it this way, Val. You'll always keep your figure."

"True." Dex put in. "But I'll bet you all anything you like she already weighed herself and thinks she's too heavy. Typical woman." He teased. The Dead Men started placing bets and I tiled my head in a grin when Skulduggery won the pool because I hadn't been able to weigh myself.

"I chucked the scale out the window this morning then it had an unfortunate series of accidents." Skulduggery said as he fanned out the money he'd won happily, then tucked it into his jacket pocket. He looked at Ghastly. "Don't suppose you feel like making Val a head covering of some sort?"

He nodded. "I have something in mind, Val, don't worry. You just let me get my hands on some material and I'll have something for you. Until then there is something in the back of the van you might like, provided you'll bring out the Echo Stone you hid back there so we call all get Gordon's input."

I nodded happily and trotted out. There was a parcel there that hadn't been there the day before beside the satchel containing the Echo Stone Uncle Gordon had given me. I took them both in, setting the Echo Stone down on the table in the common room and going to our room to change.

I just stared at the new clothes, then broke into a happy squeal and put them on. Heavy black boots that went up further than mine, black trousers and a shirt that was covered by a heavier jacket with a hood. There were black metal accessories to make a light armour for battle and a black mask that rode up to cover the lower part of my face. With the heavy armoured belt to protect my midsection and spine it looked a lot like Lord Vile's armour combined with armoured clothes.

With the hood up shadows obscured my face making the back hood look hollow and as I slipped on the gloves I admired the mass the clothing gave me. I rejoined the others and Ghastly grinned at me. "How do you like it?"

"I love it!" I said excitedly and I did. I looked like an assassin out of a video game and I did love it. Skulduggery tilted his head to look at me and nodded approvingly.

"It suits you. Though you can get some good suits and hats made, I'll insist."

"I thought I was going to be cheaper to be married to?" I asked amused.

"And that's a bad thing how?" Uncle Gordon asked as he popped into view. "I have been paying attention as you took me here and there and I can tell you this much. Serpine didn't expect Skulduggery to accept you as you are. And yet, he knows something about you or he wouldn't be after you. I don't mean to be rude, but can you call your skin back to you?" He asked.

"Gordon!" Skulduggery scolded.

"I have no idea. I have no idea how any of this works yet. My magic is working like I still have my True Name. I shouldn't be able to do any of this, should I?"

He shrugged and they all stared at me. "What?" I asked. "Darquesse is dead."

"We know that." Dex said. "But we also know how much you love Skulduggery, Val. You wouldn't be not turning back just to spare his feelings, would you?" I sighed and pulled back my hood, then stopped holding on to my skeleton form. My flesh flowed back over my bones and Saracen whistled.

"Neat trick. You'd be useful, being able to hop back and forth like that. At least now we know why Serpine wants you."

Skulduggery said nothing, he just stared at me much like Lord Vile had done and I wondered if he still loved me.

* * *

 **Personally I think Val is being daft, but these two get along like cats and dogs at times.**


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Saracen, Ghastly, Dexter, Hopeless, Larrikin, Anton, Corrival, Darquesse, Lord Vile, Kenspeckle or China.

* * *

Skulduggery folded his arms over his chest and looked at the floor. "Are you sulking?" I asked in disbelief.

"No." He said stubbornly.

"Yeah, he's sulking." Saracen said. The other men started to tease him and Skulduggery lifted his head to glare at them.

"What's the matter, Skul? You jealous?" Ghastly asked, laughing. "He is, and he's sulking more now if that's even possible."

"Can't stand having Valkyrie steal the limelight, can you?" Dexter asked gleefully.

Hopeless and Larrikin were laughing too hard to say anything, but Anton looked amused. "Almost makes you obsolete, doesn't it?" He asked and his lips twitched.

Skulduggery shot me a helpless look and I rescued him. "I'm bored. Is it safe for me to go on a grocery run?" I asked.

Ghastly shrugged. "Why not? Take Skulduggery with you. What's the worst that could happen?" He tossed me my keys but Skulduggery snagged them out of the air.

"If you think I'm being seem in that car you're crazy."

"Said the owner of the Orange-Mobile?"

"That's a lovely car! Come on, I'll drive." He growled and stalked out as the men tried not to laugh and failed miserably.

In the Bentley Skulduggery glanced over at me. "Seatbelt. I'm happy for you, actually. It was just- When we were the same, when I thought you were a skeleton like me I thought you'd be safer in battle. You're not Darquesse anymore, you know."

"I know, and that's very sweet of you, but I think it's bothering you I can do something you can't." I said and he nodded.

"It is." He sighed. "Sorry."

"It's fine, really. I like it when you sulk, it's adorable."

"I am _not_ adorable. I'm heroic, dashing, uncivilized and devastatingly handsome, but I am never adorable."

"So there's something else you can't do?" I asked and gasped in mock horror. He snorted in response but didn't rise to my bait.

When we reached a market he tilted his head at me. "Someone dressed like they cosplay Assassin's Creed and a man in a disguise. I doubt we'll attract any attention."

"It's a big box store, Skulduggery, we'll be the most normal looking people in there." I said and we were. Skulduggery kept looking at other customers with open distaste. "Stop that, you're being snobbish." I hissed as I piled groceries in our cart.

"I can't help it. Their clothes are so hideous, it's appalling."

"You have room to talk? You look like a scarecrow. Valkyrie, please tell me you'll be getting a new partner and soon." A cantankerous voice growled behind us. I turned to see Kenspeckle and caught him in a hug.

"Kenspeckle, but how?"

"When you cheated by bringing back five people instead of two a balance had to be made. For the three people who snuck over three had to come back like your friends did. I chose to be one of those people, and it's obvious who the other two were."

I nodded and Kenspeckle peered into my cart. "I remember food."

"You can't eat?"

"I don't exactly have a place to go or access to funds right now, something I blame Skulduggery for entirely." He shot Skulduggery a look and Skulduggery glared back.

"Will you two keep it down?" I hissed. But it was too late. Skulduggery manipulated the air and a carton of eggs tipped over, the lid flying open and the eggs flew out to hit Kenspeckle. They burst apart in a shower of yolks and whites, the resulting mess running down Kenspeckle who went bright red with rage.

And me. He got eggs on me. I watched them ruin my perfectly good coat and turned to Skulduggery narrowing my eyes. "Sorry?" He tried.

"Thinking of breakfast, are we?" I growled and at my gesture cartons of orange juice toppled over as the lids spun free. Streams of orange juice shot out and and drenched Skulduggery with the sticky liquid.

He gestured in return and I was splattered with milk. It dripped down my face and I literally saw red.

"You need to cool off, Detective." Kenspeckle hissed and thumbed a device in his pocket. The sprinkler system came on, drenching all three of us. Skulduggery snarled and whipped off his ruined disguise, revealing his skull. When the screaming panic started I collared them both.

"Are you insane? No magic in public!" I hissed wishing I didn't notice how Skulduggery's clothes were starting to cling to his bones. Because if I did, everyone else did too. Though I knew that was the least of our worries with his skull gleaming in the store's overhead lights.

"Run for it!" I yelled as security was starting through the chaos of screaming shoppers towards us. We all ran, sliding on the slippery floors and I cursed as we rounded a corner and I slammed into a display of chocolates, sending packages flying as I fell. Skulduggery hauled me back up to my feet and we ran on.

His shoes were squelching and had to be ruined but he grinned at me as we jogged along, Kenspeckle keeping right alongside of us. "Fun times, eh?" Skulduggery asked, then glanced behind us at the first gunshot.

 _Gunshots?_ These rent a cops were shooting at us? We ran faster, Skulduggery making bags of flour explode behind us and I heard our pursuers stop and bang into each other in the obscuring clouds of flour, cursing loudly. We made it to Bentley and were speeding away as the befuddled security guards at last came running outside.

Kenspeckle started laughing. "I haven't had that much fun in ages. I should come with you on all your cases." I looked back, he was drenched with eggs and covered with flour. Skulduggery noticed at the same time and slammed the brakes on.

"This is going to ruin the Bentley!" He complained looking back and forth between us, then looked down to his ruined suit in obvious dismay.

"Skulduggery?" Kenspeckle said anxiously. "Should security guards be so zealous in their appointed duties?" He asked and we all looked back to see a grey van speeding towards us, two of our pursuers staring at us intently from behind the windscreen. Skulduggery cursed and slammed a foot on the accelerator. The Bentley roared and shot forward.

Soon we reached heavy traffic and were weaving in and out with the van getting closer. "Those aren't mortal security guards." He growled. "They're vampires." He swung the wheel and crossed the highway, going into oncoming traffic. The van followed and I tried not to scream as Skulduggery swerved again to miss an oncoming car and a huge truck blasted by the Bentley so close that the wind from it rocked us on two wheels.

We came back down with a bang and I looked up in time to see the logging truck headed straight for us and screamed. "Calm down." Skulduggery said as he wrenched the wheel and we flew over a grassy divide and back into the right side of the highway.

We'd at last lost our pursuers but it took hours to get us all cleaned and the Bentley immaculate once more. We didn't get home with groceries until evening and by then had stopped for fast food to make up for our lateness. Skulduggery was out of The Bentley and into the hotel before we could stop him.

* * *

Corrival looked up as we trudged into the kitchen, Kenspeckle helping me with the groceries while Dex and Ghastly brought in the fast food. "Skulduggery's in a fine mood. He wants to see you for training now, Valkyrie. He said you can eat later."

I sighed and went out behind the hotel. I expected Lord Vile to take out his mounting anger on me since Kenspeckle had been needling him all day. But when he did appear at last he seemed content with himself. I gave him a small smile and I swear I heard soft laughter in return. I couldn't help it I laughed myself. "I think we're both fired. A food fight that used magic in public, then a car chase involving vampires? But it was fun."

He tilted his head in a smile. _It was fun. I don't feel like tossing you around tonight. Come here._

Lord Vile held his arms open and I went to him willingly, snuggling in close, my armoured clothes shielding me from the artic chill of his armour. Vile wrapped his arms around me. _I never thought I'd be able to do this. To feel anything but rage this way. But you've changed me._ He stepped back with a sigh. _You need your training, let's begin._

But neither one of us had the heart to attack first. I went back to him and he tilted up his visor. "I can't do it, not this way, we'll work on your armour and shadows, of course but-" He trailed off and looked down at me, then drew me into a lingering kiss.

Kissing Skulduggery in the moonlight was wonderful, and the way tilted his head slightly into the kiss made me dizzy. "Skulduggery, Valkyrie! What kind of training is this?" Ghastly demanded and we turned our heads to look at him.

"Hmm?" Skulduggery asked lazily. "Oh, I'm teaching Valkyrie how to break holds when grappling. But I'm luring her in first. Very sneaky of me." He said and I had to suck my cheeks in to keep from laughing.

"It looks like it. Let her come eat then." As we walked past him he looked at me. "The Sanctuary called. It seems there was a fight involving magic in a store today. You wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?" I shook my head no. "Good."

After dinner Skulduggery and I went back to sleeping in our room. We actually wanted Serpine to strike, and hopefully the two of us alone would make a more tempting target. Skulduggery looked gleeful about the trouble he'd caused that day. "We had fun today, didn't we?"

"We got chased by vampires and used magic in public, so yeah, it was fun. I forgot some mortals use vampires as security." I said with a sleepy yawn. "But it makes you wonder what they could be hiding, doesn't it?"

"It does indeed, which is why China sent several vans of Cleavers and detectives to investigate. The chase was covered up as well but she's furious. More angry that I put you in danger than anything."

I nodded too tired to tell Skulduggery that both Anton and I suspected that she already knew about my change. I wondered as I drifted off if she cared as a friend or as a Grand Mage who had almost lost her super weapon.

* * *

 **I thought we needed a food fight, and guns, and a car chase.**


	10. Chapter 10

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Anton, Tanith, the Dead Men, Desmond, Xena, Alice, Melissa or Serpine.

* * *

Since it was clear Serpine was biding his time Skulduggery suggested we split up to lure him out into the open. We'd return home, leaving the rest of the Dead Men with Anton. I wasn't happy, because I knew the real reason we were returning home. "Seatbelt." He said as we got in the Bentley. "I know you're terrified right now, Valkyrie, but it's time."

"But, I-" I trailed of helplessly.

"This is what we should have done the instant we returned. It's my fault for not insisting. Your family needs you, they've accepted you had no choice."

"And Alice? What about when she realizes what I did to her, Skulduggery? She'll hate me."

"You had no other choice. Had you weakened, had you been a 'good person' we wouldn't be having this conversation right now."

"I know. And I keep telling myself that, but I killed her, Skulduggery."

"Yet, as I keep telling you, she's alive. You didn't do it in a homicidal fashion, you had no other choice. Had the coach been there, or any other option you would have done that. But there was no other option, and no time. You did the right thing."

I sighed and settled back. The drive was mostly silent, and I wrestled with my warring emotions. When we got to my parent's house Skulduggery went to the front door with me. "Are you going to knock or shall I?" He asked kindly.

When I couldn't move he knocked for me, then put a comforting hand on my shoulder. My mum opened the door and just stared at me for a moment, then gathered me in a hug. "Stephanie! Skulduggery said he'd bring you home, he's been keeping us up to date on what you've been doing."

"He has?" I asked as she drug me inside and Skulduggery followed. Before she could answer Alice came barreling around the corner and launched herself at me. "Steph'nee!" She squealed happily.

"Yeah, it's me." I said, blinking back the tears in my eyes and picking her up. "I'm sorry I was gone so long, sweetie." I said, picking her up and holding her tight. I squeezed my eyes shut against my tears. I felt so terrible and now I knew what Skulduggery meant by attornment.

"Adventure." My sister said happily. And I nodded. She looked at Skulduggery, apparently unafraid of him, even without his disguise. "Thank you for the doggy." Skulduggery nodded.

"Doggy?" I asked as I set my sister down. Skulduggery didn't have time to answer as a blur of brown and black came barreling towards me. "Xena!" I said, ruffling her fur as she licked my face and snorted happily. She greeted me with friendly rumbles, then went to sit by Alice.

"Those two became fast friends." Skulduggery said.

Dad looked at him. "About time you brought our daughter home. So when are you two getting married?"

* * *

It turned out Skulduggery had been visiting and ringing my family regularly. So had Tanith and some of the others. I was touched my friends had kept watch and included my family in what was happening. But still, they were mortal, they could get hurt. Dad grinned when I mentioned it over lunch and Skulduggery tilted his head in a smile. "Why don't you show her, Desmond?" He asked, sounding amused.

Dad drug a radio he'd been tinkering on forever in. It had most of the parts missing, the dial was cracked and there was no wire. Yet when he touched it, the radio blared to life. "Wow." I said and dad grinned, obviously chuffed with himself.

"But how is it even possible?" I asked.

"Your father was raised to fear magic, yet his magic won out. Haven't you ever noticed how he can just fix things at times, yet mostly makes them worse? It depends on whether or not he's using his magic or fighting it."

"And we've been doing research, into both sides of the family." Dad added proudly. "You know those strange relations of your mum's? The ones we don't bother with because they act all dotty?"

I nodded and mum spoke next. "Well, from what we gather so far, this might be a bit of an odd marriage, but those strange relatives taught me a few things when I was very little, and I was good at it too. Steph, well, there's no easy way to say it, but I'm a witch."

I just stared at her for the longest time then nodded. It made sense. It really did. All little girls assumed their mum was magical, but it made sense now, the pies I'd seen her rescue after they'd burnt. The time she'd simply kissed a scrape away and it vanished.

Skulduggery brought them up to speed on the current case, leaving out the part where their daughter was now a walking skeleton. "We want to help." Mum said firmly and I looked at Skulduggery who just shrugged.

"They are no safer on the sidelines, my past can tell you that much." He said gently and I nodded.

"Then you both have to find people to train with, people we can trust who know your skills sets." I said and my parents nodded happily.

* * *

As we drove back to our house Skulduggery glanced over at me. "You're awfully quiet. This is a good thing, you know. They will have a few more centuries at least to kick around in, and we can see about teaching them combative skills, they'll insist."

"Oh, God, Skulduggery. What if they insist on going on cases with us? We aren't the Incredibles. It would be-"

"Embarrassing? Actually it's the norm in magical families, Valkyrie. They tend to be clannish and if you mess with one you get the fury of the others."

"Really?"

"Oh, yes, you do. And when we have children, and we will, what age will you stop protecting them at?"

"Point taken. Am I getting an engagement ring out of this?"

"Glove box."

"Sorry?"

"It's been sitting in the glove box for quite a while now. You usually get bored when I leave you in the car and fiddle with things. I've been waiting for you to find it." I cast him a skeptical look and opened the glove box. There was a black ring box inside and I took it out excitedly.

"You're hands are shaking, are you all right?" He asked, pulling to the side of the road. I nodded, feeling rather dizzy and Skulduggery took the box from me, opening it to show me the ring inside. "You approve?" He asked softly and I nodded as he slipped the ring on my finger. I felt it adjust itself and looked at him in surprise.

"Magic. It will take the place of your Necromancy ring, which I intend to smash with a hammer."

"It's beautiful." I said, and it was. A rather smug looking skull crafted in intricate detail grinned up at me, a fedora tilted down rakishly over one eye socket. It was made out of the same material as my ring and reminded me of Lord Vile's armour. "It has to be the best engagement ring ever." I said, grabbing him in a tight hug.

Skulduggery chuckled. "I'm glad you like it. I was afraid you'd want something more traditional, but you strike me as a rather practical woman."

"That I am." I agreed and snuggled into his shoulder for the rest of the drive home.

* * *

 **Fluff bunnies rejoice! I knew they had to get her family involved sometime.**


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: I don't own Skulduggery, Valkyrie, Serpine, Kenspeckle, Billy-Ray, Tanith, Ghastly, the Dead Men, Gordon or China.

* * *

Skulduggery tilted his head at me when we got home. "Valkyrie, is there anything you'd like to tell me about Serpine?"

"What?" I asked startled.

"Serpine, you know? Tried to get you to come to him in a dream, then nothing?"

"I have no idea. It isn't like him to just disappear, is it?"

"No, it isn't. Unless he thinks when your armour does at last come you'll be a maniac who will kill me for him. How is that going by they way, having Lord Vile in your head all day?" He asked, sounding amused.

"Honestly he's gotten quiet since the Lord Vile here, I mean you, I mean-"

"I thought as much. What did Serpine tell you, exactly? I noticed you were rather scanty on details." There was a note of jealousy in his voice I didn't much care for and I didn't want an argument, but he was leaving me with no choice.

"That he loves me, like he loves the first woman you stole from him. She was supposed to be his wife, Skulduggery." I said and the moment I said it I realized Serpine had meant for this to happen. Skulduggery went stiff and stared hard at me.

"I see." He said and stalked off. I followed him, but he went into the hat room and slammed the door. I sighed and let my flesh flow from my bones then shadow walked in.

"This is what he wants. He wants us to fight. He wants us to kill one another or he wants me with him as his weapon. You want to know what having Vile in my head is like?" I asked, anger rising in my voice as my shadow skin rolled over me. "I'll _show_ you what it's like." I hissed as my armour at last formed.

I felt rage at that moment, utter, pure rage. I was going to get revenge for the destruction of my future with Skulduggery, for my own suffering, I'd kill anyone who stood between me and Serpine. I strode towards Skulduggery who looked at me calmly as I gathered shadows in one hand. "That's it. Give in to that lunatic. Kill me, than Serpine, then keep on going. But it will never stop, Valkyrie, the hatred and loneliness never goes away."

It worked. My armour flowed away and I sagged back weakly. Skulduggery caught me by my shoulders. "Steady now." He said gently.

"Then you're still sad and angry?" I asked.

He sighed. "Sometimes, yes. I thought we had this discussion already, Valkyrie. I'll always love my wife and child."

"And if things had been different, you would have stayed?" I asked. Skulduggery didn't answer, he couldn't. He just looked away and my heart broke in two. I left him in the hat room, left my ring on the table in the entryway and just left.

I walked down the hill, past the two funeral homes and kept going, not caring where I ended up, but knowing it couldn't be with Serpine or China. They'd both turn my loss to their advantage. I shivered, heartbroken. The Bentley rolled up beside me.

 _Get in._

"You get in." I mumbled, wiping tears from my eyes and blaming the wind that had picked up.

 _Get in, or the pain I caused you when I saw Serpine will be nothing compared to now._

"Yes, boss." I got in and Skulduggery looked at me.

"Seatbelt." He said quietly. I did as he asked and he drove on. "It isn't like you to give up easily. Val. So now you know the truth. I should have told you before."

"I can't marry you, not now. What if you change your mind, or she does?" I asked, trying to fight my tears and failing. Skulduggery sighed and said nothing.

* * *

He at last agreed to drop me off at Gordon's mansion. And without his Echo Stone there it was cold and lonely. I went to my room and curled up in a ball and cried my heart out. I couldn't bear to call my parents and I didn't want the Dead Men to know. I'd call Tanith but I knew she would tell Ghastly. But Kenspeckle wouldn't tell anybody, would he?

I knew the others had already given him a mobile and I dialed his number from the scrap of paper he'd given me. "Hello?" His gruff voice came on the line and I burst into tears again.

"Valkyrie? What did that monster do to you?" He soothed. It took a while but I managed to tell him. "I could have told you he wasn't good enough for you. Now you just listen to me, Valkyrie. The Sanctuary is searching for Serpine. They can't find him or Billy-Ray. They've searched everywhere but Gordon's mansion."

"I'm in the mansion." I said dully. Kenspeckle started to say something, but I couldn't respond as two steely hands grabbed my feet that had been hanging over the edge of the bed. I looked down as Billy-Ray slapped cuffs around my ankles and felt my magic drain from me. He came the rest of the way through the floor and grinned down at me, then grabbed my mobile.

"I don't know who this is, but Valkyrie Cain is no longer available. Would you like to leave a message?" He asked cheerfully. "Mmm-hmm. I see. Well, tell you what, Mr. Grouse, is it? Valkyrie's got herself a date with a man who's madly in love with her. Only as he knows she's all shy and everythin' she'll be livin' in a cage for the initial meetin'. Not exactly romantic, but he didn't come back just to loose the woman he loves. You all have a nice day now, you hear?"

Billy-Ray hung up and came back over to me, cuffing my hands behind my back. "Would've guessed you'd have wriggled off the bed by now, princess. All the fight left you when your fellah dumped you, huh?" He didn't wait for a reply but scooped me up into his arms and carried me down the stairs. He set me down to get the front door. "If I was you, I'd behave. I didn't say how many pieces I'd bring you back in." He said when I stumbled. I just shrugged helplessly and he carried me out to a waiting van and got me in the back, locking the door. Billy-Ray got in the front and drove.

We drove for what seemed like hours and when we stopped at last I didn't fight him. Billy-Ray frowned at me. "You better not be dyin' on me." He growled, then slipped a black hood over my head and slung me over his shoulder. I felt him carry me a distance, then we entered a building. He carried me for a while, then I felt myself set down on a cold stone floor. A metal door slammed and I felt the hood ripped from my head.

"There's no need to be so rough, Mr. Sanguine." Serpine said from somewhere outside my cell, his voice dripping with menace.

"No, Sir." Billy-Ray agreed nervously. Then he started to scream. I twisted around to see Serpine using his red hand on Billy-Ray and his screams were terrible.

"Please, stop." I said. Serpine looked at me and shrugged. He put his hand down and Billy-Ray gasped and gagged.

"Very well, my dear. You see? I told you he would reject you. Just as he rejected China for his wife, that he stole from me. Such a petty, selfish man, your Skulduggery, isn't he?"

I shrugged. I had to play for time, I knew that. "Could I get these cuffs off?" I asked and he nodded. Serpine looked down at Billy-Ray and ordered him to unlock them. Billy-Ray managed to crawl over and once I'd scooted up to the bars he unlocked my feet first, then my hands. He caressed me with his index finger twice and I knew enough not to let on that it had happened.

* * *

Days passed. Serpine would come visit me. He tried to get me to talk, but was smart enough not to come within my reach. He smiled at me on the fourth morning. "I wonder why he hasn't shown up yet. Do you think maybe he's back with his wife?" He asked. I stared at him, hard. "Or maybe he's with China instead."

 _He's baiting you._

"You don't love me, we both know that. Was his wife worth all the destruction she's causing, all the lives she's ruined?"

"Skulduggery believes she is. Do you think he would have returned to you if she still loved him? Do you really think he would return to a child when he could have a woman?"

 _Keep calm._

"So, you want to sleep with me because I'm a child? That's messed up, even for you." Serpine looked at me, his eyes narrowing and left without a word. Billy-Ray who had stayed behind whistled in admiration.

"So, there's some fight left in you after all. Good. You're gonna need it when his patience runs out. Take two guesses what happens to me after he kills you."

"So you're saving your own skin then?" I asked and he shrugged.

"And yours. Ain't fun gettin' kicked to the curb, is it? Tanith's back with Ghastly." He managed, his voice strangled. "And you lost Skulduggery, so we're even."

"Because you know this pain is worse than anything you could do to me?" I asked and he nodded. We made our plans and we made our escape that night, Billy-Ray having neglected to mention the fact to Serpine that he'd figured out a way to tunnel through iron bars as well.

We parted miles off, Billy-Ray dumping me off by a waiting elegant car. I got in as he peeled away and wasn't surprised to see China Sorrows driving. He mouth was set in a thin line. "I blame Skulduggery for this. We have no idea where he is."

"He's missing? I asked a little too gleefully and she looked at me.

"I thought you'd care."

"I thought he loved me. He's probably back with his wife."

China sighed. "And I though I was a poor looser. So that's it? You don't care if he comes back or not?"

"Why should I?"

China slammed on the breaks and looked at me, her beautiful blue eyes hard like chips of ice. "Because it's you he loves. Do you know what that man's been through? The guilt he had to fight just to admit his love for you? He might love his wife, but he isn't _in_ love with her."

"Oh. Then I guess I'm heading the rescue mission, aren't I?"

"That's better. He disappeared after ringing the Sanctuary to let me know he'd dropped you at the mansion. I sent Cleavers for your protection but I was too late. Both you and he were gone."

"Do we know he didn't run off?"

"We don't know anything, as usual." China sighed and we drove the rest of the way to the Sanctuary in silence.

* * *

 **Oh, dear. I honestly didn't mean for it to get that sad, I really didn't. But these two have a habit of petty jealousy and misunderstandings.**


	12. Chapter 12

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, China, the Dead Men, Tipstaff, Billy-Ray, Ghastly, Cleavers, Tanith, Dex, Saracen, Hopeless, Larrikin, Lord Vile or Corrival.

* * *

The other Dead Men were already gathered in China's throne room when we arrived. I wouldn't make eye contact with them but kept my attention on China. "Any news, Tipstaff?" She asked and he shook his head.

"None, Grand Mage." He said and everyone shifted their attention to me.

"What?" I asked.

"Did you see the Bentley when Sanguine took you?" Ghastly asked.

"No. He'd just threatened me so I was keeping my attention on him." I said, then mentally kicked myself. "Skulduggery didn't leave, did he? He was there?"

"When the Cleavers arrived they found no trace of him or the Bentley. We wanted you out there as bait, it's true, but he wouldn't have just left you there. I don't like this." Ghastly grumbled, and that made two of us.

The other Dead Men were watching me carefully as a detective ran in. "Detective Pleasant's car has been found!" He said excitedly. "Our men are searching the area as we speak." China stared at him.

"Where?" She asked and and the command in her voice the excitement faded from his face.

"Near a mortal town. It had been driven off a pier." My heart sank and I had a good idea what town he had meant.

* * *

We all loaded into Ghastly's van for the ride over. I had refused to stay behind and get medical treatment. He looked at me worriedly as I sat in the front beside him. "We thought we'd lost both of you. When Sanguine contacted the Sanctuary we expected a trap to be honest."

"He thought I'd suffer more this way." I said and Ghastly nodded tightly. "Sorry. But he's not after Tanith, so at least we have that."

"We know he isn't. The only reason he isn't dead is that he agreed to return to America. But we can't find Serpine either. It would help if you knew where you were held."

"I told China what I could, I just don't know. Billy-Ray had me hooded on the way in and on the way out we were running too fast after we came up for me to bother looking back."

"It's all right, Val. And we'll find him. I'm actually surprised you and Skulduggery didn't break up sooner. Not that I approve, mind you. He loves you, Val. But he's a broken man. Centuries of missing his wife and child? You just don't walk away from that."

"Then he met a brat kid and fell in love with her when she grew up." Dex put in.

"The guilt he must feel." Saracen said gleefully.

"I hate all of you so much right now." I growled and they laughed. My mobile, which Ghastly has found in my bedroom rang and they all looked at me as I answered. I recognized the number, so I put it on speaker.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Valkyrie?" I was Skulduggery's voice. "Can you come find me? I'm lost." He said plaintively. I laughed, then started to cry happy tears.

"You're thick as a brick, you know that?"

"Yes. Sorry."

"No need to apologize. What can you see around you, anything?" Skulduggery gave us descriptions and Ghastly knew where he was immediately. We all did. Skulduggery Pleasant had returned to his own home and didn't recognize it.

* * *

After the men had seen he was all right and insisted on camping out into the living room I drug Skulduggery into the hat room. "Lost my right eye. What did you do?" I hissed.

"Nothing."

"They might buy you loosing your memory, but I don't. What was so bad that you purposely drove the Bentley off a pier?"

"I did?" I glared at him and he sighed. "Serpine's dead." He said flatly. "He got Lord Vile, just not the one he wanted. Shall I go into detail about what Lord Vile did to him? What Lord Vile made him suffer through for daring to touch the woman he loved?"

"No." I said softly. "But what took him so long?" I asked and Skulduggery titled his head in a smile.

"I was having a grand sulk. I left Gordon's mansion hoping to get captured so you'd have to rescue me and admit you love me. But you got captured first so I had a sulk over that too."

"A sulky Lord Vile, I would have loved to see that."

"Mm. Serpine didn't." Skulduggery said playfully. "And if you don't want to see him sulk you really should put your engagement ring back on. He had a lot of fun destroying your other ring, by the way." Skulduggery said brightly as he slipped my ring back on then bent slightly to kiss me.

I returned the kiss, sighing as we heard a knock on the door. We broke apart and found Saracen on the other side, grinning like an idiot. "We're going to order delivery, Val. You want anything?"

"Some privacy would be nice." Skulduggery grumbled.

Saracen laughed and led the way back out to meet the others. Corrival grinned at us. "Lost his memory indeed. I take it we don't have to worry about Serpine then?" He asked and grunted in satisfaction when we shook our heads no. "Good. But you two have guests for the night whether you want them or not."

We agreed and we all also agreed the truth of what happened would never leave the room. Skulduggery made a few calls and I imagined the Grand Mage was having Sensitives cover up the mess Lord Vile had made.

The pizza came and I settled onto the couch with my share, sighing in relief. The men wolfed down their food and were already ordering more. "When's the last time you ate?" I asked and Dex looked up and shrugged.

"We'd lost two of our own, Val. We ate when we had to." Larrikin said. "Now that you're back Hopeless and I aren't the youngest Dead Men anymore. Which means you get all the bad jobs no one else wants."

"Like keeping an eye on Skulduggery." Hopeless said with a grin.

Skulduggery huffed slightly, but he didn't seem to care.

"What I still don't understand is how we cheated and brought back all of you in the first place." I said.

"Poké Balls." Skulduggery said.

"Sorry?"

"Kenspeckle said to tell you that if you ever asked, they work like Poké Balls. When we went to the land of the dead we needed to work around how to bring back the dead. One way would have been to go to the land of the dead and have them walk right out. Which we did. Another would be to cheat. Which we also did. Think of the dummy Echo Stones like Poké Balls. Something physical could go in them, reside inside and come back out with no harm done. He got the idea from seeing reruns, apparently."

"You mean we can toss them at bad guys and capture them inside?" I asked excitedly and he laughed.

"Wouldn't that make our jobs easier? No, one-use only, I'm afraid. And they only work on the dead. In the land of the dead. So no getting any bright ideas." He said, sounding amused.

We stayed with our friends for a while then retired to our room. There was no question of Skulduggery staying with me. He stretched and actually yawned after he settled under the covers. "I'm beat."

I murmured sleepily and cuddled in, smiling when the lights went out at his gesture. "You'll have to teach me that."

"Noted. Serpine really did get the see the Lord Vile you know. He'd stolen you away from him and Lord Vile was going to have his vengeance. And he did, making Serpine suffer in a way that made his red hand look like a child's toy."

"What did he do?"

"He reminded Serpine, that he, Nefarian Serpine had freely killed the only woman he ever loved. The man's mind snapped, then and there."

"And?"

"And then Lord Vile did some rather terrible things involving his shadows that we won't go into."

"Good." I paused. "Skulduggery?"

"Hmm?"

"Are we still getting married?" I asked and heard the surprise in his velvety voice when he answered.

"Of course. Why wouldn't we? I did give you an engagement ring. Twice now."

"It's just that we fought- And the things I said..." I trailed off. He kissed me in the darkness.

"We fight all the time, it's how we get along, mostly. And I didn't clarify myself. I love my wife, I'm not _in_ love with her."

"Oh. And my age, you're OK about my age?"

"Why wouldn't I be? Let me guess, the Dead Men have been giving you all sorts of advice. The only reason I didn't propose 'til now is that I was sure you'd say no. You may have said you loved me, but I always thought: "That's nice." I never thought it meant you were really in love with me."

"I'm starting to see how you didn't miss your skull for a while."

"Hush." He said. And so I did.

* * *

 **Well, I can leave it there or go on. Let me know.**


	13. Chapter 13

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Lord Vile, China, Ghastly, Dexter, Saracen, Hopeless, Larrikin, Tipstaff, Kenspeckle, Anton, Fletcher or any of you fine people. Because owning people is very wrong.

* * *

I woke up, cocooned in warmth and not wanting to move from Skulduggery's embrace. "Mm. You're nice and warm." I murmured. "But we have to get up and make breakfast for the others, don't we?"

"Well, it's two, so not really. And the others have gone so-" I bolted up.

"You let me sleep in until two?" I asked, dismayed.

Skulduggery tilted his head in a smile. "I did, you needed it. You were abducted, Valkyrie. Held prisoner, you needed the rest."

 _True._

"Shut up." I barked and Skulduggery looked wounded. "Not you, him." I said and heard soft laughter in my head. "Is there a way to put a muzzle on him?"

"On Lord Vile? No. But he's not known for being chatty. He must like you."

"I think he likes _you_." I said with a yawn and a stretch. "He was agreeing with you."

"Well, of course he would, I'm _me_. Get up and get dressed, Cold Pop Tarts and coffee await." He said cheerfully. I did, grabbing a shower as well and as I ate my breakfast Skulduggery explained we were expected at the Sanctuary.

"Why?" I asked around a mouthful of food.

"I have no idea. I suppose they want to congratulate us. I'll be right there with you, Valkyrie. I'm not going to let anything bad happen to you." I nodded. We both knew they might get the idea to lock me in a cell or the Cube. But Skulduggery assured me as we drove that he'd told them I was the watered-down version of Lord Vile and most likely unable to fight a kitten, let alone anything else.

"A kitten? Why would I want to fight a kitten?"

"It could be a ninja."

I tried not to laugh and failed. "You're being silly again."

"So glad you noticed."

 _He has a point._

"He does, doesn't he?" I asked, but Vile fell silent and Skulduggery cast me a worried glance.

"Are you quite all right?" He asked worriedly.

"Yeah, yes. I'm good. I have to stop answering him out loud, don't I? If I keep it up it will make people think I'm crazy, won't it?"

"It would _help_." He agreed.

* * *

I'd let my skin flow away and put my hood up before entering the Sanctuary. Even for people used to me and used to Skulduggery it was nice to see the double takes. Tipstaff met us outside the throne room, looking rather gobsmacked. I thought it looked like his neck had been nibbled on, but he adjusted his collar and smiled stupidly at us. "Detectives, the Grand Mage will see you now. Shall I announce you?" He asked politely and we nodded.

I was doing all I could not to laugh. Not at him, that would have been mean. I just never expected to see him with mussed up hair and a crooked tie. He led the way in and announced us, and China facpalmed. "Your hair, Administrator." She said with a sigh. "Go, make yourself decent." She waved her hand dismissively but smiled fondly at him all the same. Tipstaff left with the same goofy smile on his face and I faked a cough to cover my laugh.

China looked at me then smiled. "A girl has a right to be happy." She said and I nodded my agreement. "How are you feeling, Valkyrie?" She asked and I shrugged.

"Fine, I guess."

"You'd be up to another case?" She asked carefully.

I lowered my hood and looked at her since I knew it was what she wanted. "Never more ready." I said cheerfully and she smiled faintly and nodded.

* * *

"Good, because we do have a case, you can go see the Elder of your choice for it, you're dismissed." I waited until we were outside her throne room and looked at Skulduggery.

"New Elders? When did that happen? There haven't been elections, have there?" I asked and he shrugged. We went to Ghastly's old office and knocked. The door swung open of it's own accord and we both stared at the new Elder.

"You've got to be kidding me." Skulduggery muttered as we entered. "You, an Elder?" He asked and the new Elder smiled.

"Ghastly has his shop, Kenspeckle has a lab here, Anton has a hotel to run. And I'll be a very good Elder."

"Was there even an election? People actually _voted_ for you?" I asked and Saracen looked hurt. "Sorry. Who is the other Elder?"

"Dex. We're heroes, Val. People actually wanted Hopeless and Larrikin but they are determined to be Sanctuary detectives. It helps I arranged housing and funds for them, of course." I nodded. "But as charming and wonderful as I am, you aren't here to see me, are you?" He asked and we shook our heads no. Saracen sighed. "Here's your case, no idea what it's about. Maybe Dex read the file. Me, I've been interviewing shapely secretaries. Now, begone." He said cheerfully.

We went to Dex's office and he looked up from paperwork. "I see the idiot gave you your file, he didn't read it, did he?" He asked and we shook our heads no. "Typical, have a seat." We sat and I felt like I was in a bad dream. Ghastly was supposed to be an Elder, that was how things got done.

Dex caught my unhappy look. "I am responsible, Val, when I have to be. I actually bothered reading your file. It dawned on the powers that be that Sanguine might have some valuable information."

"What information?" I asked with a frown.

"Think, Valkyrie. What did he and Serpine do that was different that what we did?" Skulduggery asked.

"Oh. But we have no idea how they came back."

"Exactly." Dex confirmed. "And since we don't want the Americans getting any bright ideas-"

"Like bring back all the people they want on their side?" I asked and he nodded. "Then we have to find him."

"Right you are. Our sources tell us he left Ireland, but he wasn't on the plane when it landed in America."

"He jumped?" I asked in surprise, finding it hard to imagine Sanguine parachuting to freedom.

"He teleported, didn't he?" Skulduggery asked and Dex nodded.

"The plane was checked by our people over there, it's obvious that he went to the back of the plane and just vanished, clear marks of Adept magic, most likely teleportation."

I didn't want to hear this. "But, Dex, there is only one teleporter that we know of. Why would he help Sanguine of all people?"

"That's the other part of your mission, finding Fletcher Renn."

* * *

 **Cue dramatic music. Why would Fletcher help Sanguine? Was it a teleporter or some other mage with more shadowy powers? Only time will tell!**


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: I don't own Skulduggery, Valkyrie, Lord Vile, Billy-Ray, Erskine or Fletcher.

* * *

I hated planes. Skulduggery knew I hated planes. And flying. The wings could fall off. The engines could explode. A million things could go wrong. I gripped my armrests until my knuckles were white and cringed as the plane flew into another pocket of turbulence. "Tell me again why Lord Vile couldn't just teleport us there?"

"And into a trap? He'd need time to recover, you know that."

"Right. OK."

"You are still an Elemental you know. And if you put your hood up in an emergency you'll most likely survive a crash."

"So not helping."

"Sorry."

I sighed and sat back, trying to calm myself. Skulduggery was right. The idea that anything bad could happen was silly. Wasn't I safer up here than on a highway? Great. Now I'd worry on highways too.

 _He's right. You are the watered-down version of me._

 _Shut. Up._ I thought back and Vile chuckled in response.

 _Scaredy cat._

 _Says you._ I thought back irritably.

 _He's watching you. Never forget that under that cheerful personality he is Lord Vile._

I blinked my eyes open and caught Skulduggery staring at me. "Was I that obvious?" I asked.

"No. How about some peanuts?"

"No, I have bad memories of peanuts."

"Sorry?"

"Well, a peanut. And it wasn't so much a peanut as it was a peanut costume. And it wasn't so much the peanut costume as it was the woman inside it." I trailed off. "It finally happened. My stories and analogies are as bad as yours."

Skulduggery snorted and beckoned a steward who gave me a Coke off his little cart along with a bag of peanuts and went on his way. "Eat hearty, it's included in your ticket price."

"That's so generous of you, Skulduggery." I said, then smiled at him and went on more gently. "I mean it. You could have had me starve and demanded your money back."

"I was feeling indulgent. Besides, you have another can of soda and bag of peanuts coming. I tucked mine into my pouch." I looked at him.

"That pouch comes in handy."

"That it does. The Bentley should be fixed soon. The mechanic says the water was the best thing for it actually."

"Really?" I asked hopefully and he laughed.

"No, not really. It's a _Bentley_ for goodness' sake. Not a submarine." He said then chortled again. I punched him in the arm. Hard. "Ow!" He whined. "I think the air marshal is looking at you." He tittered and I glanced around nervously. "Got you again, Val, you're fun to tease."

"Tell me this is your attempt to distract me from when I am right now."

"It is. How's it working?"

"It is, actually."

"Well, there you go then." He said warmly, taking my hand in his. "Just think, Val. Hundreds of years from now they'll have transporters like in Star Trek and you'll _wish_ they went back to something as safe as planes."

"You're strange. Really strange."

"Thanks for noticing. Speaking of strange, what do you think of Sanguine's disappearance?" He asked and caught my wince in response. "We have to face it, Valkyrie. Fletcher was most likely involved. We just don't know why yet."

"He can be impulsive, we know that. He could have done this without thinking it through, or he was forced into it."

"Blackmail?"

"Possibly." I agreed. But in the back of my mind I wondered if he hadn't chose to help Sanguine for his own reasons.

* * *

We landed at last and after clearing customs we got a rental car and headed for Texas. It was a quiet ride for the first few hours. Then Skulduggery decided to talk. "We have to check, Val. He could be there, you know. Lying low, not in his home, but close by, perhaps."

"It just feels like we're wasting time, Skulduggery. We can't imprison Sanguine, and he's not going to want to leave Texas."

"I know, but we don't want the American Sanctuary torturing him either. We can persuade him to come back to Ireland then we can torture him."

"Very funny. Do we think he is in their Sanctuary already?" I asked and he shrugged. "Skulduggery, you and I aren't just doing this to distract them, are we?"

"Maybe." He admitted. "And maybe not." He sighed. "We're being kept out of the loop. It isn't like when Erskine was in office, we could get away with more then."

"He wanted us to fail though. In the end you know he did."

"Did he? For all his faults, for all the terrible things he did, Valkyrie, the man had a vision. He had the _wrong_ vision, but he had one all the same."

"And it cost us two Dead Men."

"Who are back now. But Erskine? He's never coming back."

 _He hopes._

I ignored Vile the best I could. Because if Erskine came back he'd rot inside a prison cell the rest of his life. I'd hated him when I'd returned and found out what he'd done. I'd wanted to see him suffer forever, but if he had to suffer, we all did. We'd all killed people who mattered to other people. When did it end? When did the killing and vengeance ever end? I sighed. "There's been enough killing. Tell me there's been enough killing."

Skulduggery looked over. "It's always a last resort. Valkyrie, never the first. We're here to persuade the man to come back to Ireland. And look for Fletcher while we're at it. We've been dancing around the issue, Val, but there's every chance Fletched did this freely."

"But why?"

"Money, maybe. Maybe he's gone to the dark side. You never know." He said and elbowed me gently, trying to cheer me up.

And as we drove along I could only hope Fletcher had a good reason because if we did have to arrest him catching him would be next to impossible.

* * *

 **Fletcher gone to the dark side? Say it isn't so. The story is really writing itself at this point and that's always a good sign.**


	15. Chapter 15

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Fletcher, Billy-Ray, China the Dead Men, Kenspeckle, Darquesse or Lord Vile.

* * *

It turned out Fletcher was involved and crashing at Sanguine's house. Sanguine didn't look surprised to see us and he listened calmly when Skulduggery explained why we needed him back in Ireland. He asked if Fletcher would return Skulduggery to Ireland and await a call, then we would follow. Skulduggery looked troubled, but I nodded my agreement.

As soon as they teleported Sanguine frowned at me. "Making the same mistake twice?" He asked. "I thought you were smarter than that."

"He- I don't think Skulduggery knows what he wants. In a lot of ways we are a mistake. We're partners. Partners don't get involved for a reason. And I don't trust him, not completely, to know what he wants."

"Then you're gonna get burned again, girly."

"You too." I said softly and he nodded painfully. "I'm sorry, Billy-Ray, I really am, but there's no way around this. They will kill you. You know that."

"And goin' back is gonna kill me." He sighed. "Let's go." He said quietly. He made a call and Fletcher appeared to teleport us back. China looked at us several beats too long and I exchanged uneasy glances with Billy-Ray. Suddenly he lunged and wrapped his arms around me and sank into the stones below us.

We fled the Sanctuary. "Glad you realized it was a rescue mission." Billy-Ray said, stopping far underground and far away from the Sanctuary. I nodded.

"You don't pine for centuries then just walk away. She's got death in mind for both of us."

Billy-Ray chuckled darkly. "Coulda told you that. Now why didn't we get along like this from the start?"

I shrugged again. "No idea."

* * *

Billy-Ray had contacts to get us back out of the country, but we knew America was out of the question. So was anyone friendly with them. He actually had no idea how he had managed to come back, but I doubted anyone would believe him. We ended up in Canada, far, far away from where America or anyone else dared go.

Their Sanctuary couldn't have cared less about us, so we were safe. I looked at Billy-Ray as our plane landed. "We could be on our own for years. I hate to admit it, but we're better off together."

He nodded. "My thoughts exactly. So that stuff China was shoutin' as we escaped, about you bein' some sort of super weapon-"

"If I choose to be, Billy-Ray, with Darquesse I had no choice. She became her own being. It works out better for Vile if his second in command comes to him willingly." What I didn't add, of course, was that what Skulduggery had seen was me still in control. If I fully became Lord Vile he'd unleash himself on the nearest target and keep going.

 _True._ Vile agreed with me. _China has to die, you know that._

I nodded inwardly. I agreed. Because she was clearly out of control. But we had to wait until she'd done enough before we returned to get rid of her. Too soon and we'd be criminals, wait long enough and we'd be heroes. I explained the plan to Billy-Ray in our hotel and he whistled in admiration. "You _are_ Lord Vile, because that is exactly somethin' he would do. If he cared what people thought of him."

We kept our ears to the ground and I learned to master Lord Vile's final form. They tried a few false arrests, and when that didn't work the Sanctuary arrested all my friends for real and started hunting the Dead Men. Still, we waited. We waited until China spilled blood and the blood she spilled was innocent blood. That was all it took for Vile to completely take over.

 _Then I was Vile._

 _I didn't see why Valkyrie had waited so long and I didn't care. All I am is hatred and vengeance. I kill my enemies then I find new ones to kill. I returned to the Sanctuary alone, seeing how far her corruption had spread. And if it wasn't locked in a gaol cell I laid waste to it. Her Cleavers, now dressed in black, were the first to go. My shadows sliced through them, sending pieces spinning in all directions._

 _I took them all. Everyone I could find. I didn't care how they screamed and pleaded for their insignifigant lives. If they were hers, they were fated to die. And once I'd killed every last one of them I marched into her throne room and I killed her too. It was pitifully easy to swipe that pretty head of hers off her body with one pass of my shadows and I allowed myself a smile as her head toppled off her body to land at my feet. I stepped back, letting Valkyrie surface and enjoyed her reaction._

I looked around me numbly. Vile had made me watch and now he gave me enough strength to go down to the gaol and release my friends. But my hands were already shaking. I was going to die, I knew that. Vile had done the right thing, but you don't wipe out an entire Sanctuary and walk away from it. As soon as they were free I let Vile take over again.

 _I shadow walked Valkyrie to safety. Back to Canada, where she's no doubt hide until she realized I was right. We'd cleansed evil from the face of the earth. We'd destroyed the woman who destroyed my family and I could release Valkyrie, though I'd never be far away._

Billy-Ray looked up when I returned, seemingly wide-eyed. "The news is already spreadin'. Lord Vile is a hero. He overthrew China and saved the Dead Men."

"You have good contacts. You know I can never go back, right? Skulduggery will separate my head from my shoulders, so will the rest of the Dead Men."

"But you saved them!"

"At the cost of several hundred lives, Billy-Ray. And I killed a Grand Mage. The Dead Men are most likely hunting me down right now." I said. Billy-Ray tried to disagree but I was no hero and I knew it. I only had one option left, to flee to the reality of the Vile who had corrupted me.

* * *

Kenspeckle had managed to leave the Sanctuary as many people had and he sighed when I tracked him down. "Valkyrie, you're making a mistake. You're a hero, you killed bad people, Valkyrie. Nobody good was left by the time Vile showed up."

"And what about next time, Kenspeckle? Do you think he will really care who he kills next?" Kenspeckle sighed and massaged his face.

"There's a cot in the back. I'll give you something to help you sleep." I nodded and went back, accepting the tablets and drifted to sleep and when I woke up I was being shaken roughly. I realized I'd fallen asleep in the rental and looked over at Skulduggery.

I told him about the dream and he nodded. "Vile has gifts you wouldn't dream of, Valkyrie. He gave you a vision of the future."

"One we can change, right? I can't go through it, Skulduggery, not again. I can't become him. All those people he killed. I killed."

"I don't know if we can change it Valkyrie, but just having the vision changes the future. We find Billy-Ray and Fletcher and we all flee. I want to avoid bloodshed if we can, but if we can't I expect you to let Vile out and let him do what he has to do." I nodded and soon enough we'd found the men we were looking for and Fletcher had teleported us all to Haiti.

The Haitian Sanctuary did not look kindly on outsiders coming in and taking what was theirs, and they had a long history of welcoming outcasts. Their Grand Mage favoured top hats and fancy dress suits, but I didn't mind eccentric as long as we were safe. He grinned at us over breakfast on the second morning. "You made the right choice, my friends. People hear all sorts of nonsense about Haiti. Some true, mostly lies. We will wait and see if those fools will dare step foot on Haitian soil. If they do, they will be sorry. Your friends will be arriving soon and will be welcomed with open arms." He gave us a toothy grin and I smiled back.

There was something otherworldly about him. And when I allowed my skin to flow away and became a skeleton to watch him at one point I saw the skeleton under the illusion of a man smiling back at me. He winked, somehow or other, then walked off, laughing that deep belly laugh and twirling his skull topped cane and I wondered what kind of allies we'd gotten.

* * *

 **Yes, yes. I know. A tad violent compared to some of the previous chapters, but it did us good, I bet. For those keeping tack I was listening to an 80's smooth jazz playlist, and actually rather cheerful when I wrote this.**


	16. Chapter 16

A/N: I don't own Skulduggery, Valkyrie, Fletcher, Ghastly, Billy-Ray, Tanith, China, Kenspeckle, Cleavers, Dex, Anton, Corrival or the Dead Men.

* * *

Once all the Dead Men had arrived and Fletcher and Billy-Ray were with us Skulduggery looked at us. "Lovely of you all to come. Now I know the trip was long and tiring, but we have to go back."

"Are you insane?" I hissed and he turned to glance at me.

"More than likely. But we're going to make the one move so foolish even China wouldn't expect us to. We should meet very little opposition if we teleport right into her throne room when she's there." He looked at Kenspeckle who had also joined us. "You brought the remote viewer?" Kenspeckle nodded. "Good."

Kenspeckle drew out a small device that looked a lot like a mobile so we could see China's throne room. "What?" He growled cantankerously when we all looked underwhelmed at the tiny screen. "It was the best I could do with the time and materials that I had."

"Which is good enough, I assure you." Skulduggery said so kindly that Kenspeckle blinked in surprise. "All right then, everyone gather round and hold hands. Fletcher, you can get us there?" Fletcher nodded.

"Skulduggery-" Ghastly began but Skulduggery cut him off with a look,

"We're going back to do what needs to be done. What I should have done a long time ago." He said and Ghastly nodded and we all joined hands. And then the world was spinning, and I was dizzy, and we were in the throne room. And Skulduggery was walking towards China who looked quite amused to see him until he took out his revolver and shot her twice at point blank range. Once through the heart and once through the head.

I just stared and walked up to him as the others gathered around us. "How do you feel?" I asked in a small voice as he pocketed his revolver.

He turned to me. "Hmm? Never felt better. Vile wasn't warning you. The Vile in you was speaking to the Vile in me."

"I see."

"Do you?"

"Not really." I admitted.

"What did he say, Valkyrie? That he was going to kill the woman who murdered his family. Not the woman who helped him do it. I took responsibility for all these centuries. shared the guilt that was China's alone. Lots of people break up and don't go homicidal."

"I told you that _when_?" I asked exasperated. "Weeks ago? Months?"

"No you didn't." He said then tilted his head in a smile to show me that I had. As usual it had just taken a while to get past his ego because he hadn't thought of it first.

"You are so incredibly thick sometimes." I growled and Corrival laughed.

"We all suspected as much. How did China really get to be Grand Mage, Valkyrie?"

I thought for a moment. "We really couldn't spare anyone else for the job."

"Well done." Skulduggery praised. "We all knew that much power would go to her head and she'd push things too far."

"It sounds like you all let her become Grand Mage so you'd all finally have a reason to fight her." I said slowly.

"Dead Men hold grudges, Val." Dex said. "And we all knew China was not to be trusted. So yeah, she was put in a position of power because we couldn't spare anyone else. That and who would care if anyone killed her?" He shrugged and for a moment I remembered that all the Dead Men were highly efficient killers. Then he gave me a goofy grin and gathered me in a hug.

"And we're also great at planning weddings." Ghastly teased. "You're not getting a black dress so don't even ask." He said, smiling at me.

"Aw."

"Yes, aw." Skulduggery chimed in. "Can't she have a black wedding dress? Please?" He tilted his head in a grin.

"You two have got to be kidding." Ghastly said in dismay.

"Nope." I said and smiled at him.

"It will look like a funeral." He said, exasperated.

"She is marrying a Dead Man." Anton said and Skulduggery looked amused at his play on words. "Besides, black is her colour." He added, coming to gather me in a hug, then he and the other Dead Men drifted from the throne room as Cleavers came in to carry China's body out. Skulduggery flexed his hand before they could reach her and her body went up in shadowy flames, burning to nothing but ash.

"Just to be sure." He said cheerfully.

* * *

"Are you excited?" Skulduggery asked as we at last got home.

"I am and I'm happy. Not for what you had to do, but that our friends are safe now."

"Agreed. I kept after you to get back with your family, to not take the blame where there was none to be taken. But being fair with others while I unjustly punish myself is my only flaw. Was. I intend to bask in the glory that is me from now on."

"Tell me you're joking."

"Not really."

* * *

We were settled in to watch the evening news when my mobile rang. I groaned and answered it. "Yes, Ghastly?" I asked sleepily.

"I know you've been through a lot lately, Val, and you two are beat, but Tanith and I could do with a visit." I was suddenly wide awake and Skulduggery was flicking off the set. I'd told Ghastly we'd be right over and expected maybe tea. Not the cartons of take away he had ready for us.

Skulduggery watched me eat, a contented smile on his face. "I wish you could eat with me." I said and he waved a dismissive hand.

"It's enough to watch you eat. You'll be eating even more when the baby is coming."

I paused with my fork to my mouth. "What baby?"

"The baby, the one we'll be having. You know? Together?" I nodded then looked at Ghastly for help.

"I take it you two are using magic." He said and Skulduggery nodded.

"We are. Don't look so shocked, Valkyrie. When we discussed children a while back you didn't bother to correct me so I assumed you knew they'd be coming from you through magical means. But if you don't want my children-" He said in mock anguish and I laughed.

"No, I very much want your children. Never thought I'd hear myself say that." I said and Skulduggery Pleasant just smiled in reply.

* * *

 **This chapter was initially very different and a lot longer. Trust me, this version works better and got us back into the action.**


	17. Chapter 17

A/N: I don't own Skulduggery, Valkyrie, Ghastly, Kenspeckle or Corrival. Once again a chapter popped into my head that was a lot better than the original. Trust me. Violence ahead. Just a tad.

* * *

I stared at the wedding dress Ghastly had made for me. It was beyond beautiful. A sable so rich and deep it seemed to be crafted out of shadows and the accents of glittering gems in skull patterns only added to its beauty. But the only thing I could do was stare at it open-mouthed. _Oh my God. This means it's all real. That we're getting married. That I'm having babies. I don't want to be married. I don't want to have babies. I want to run. Run and hide._ I thought helplessly.

Ghastly put a gentle hand on my shoulder. "Come have some tea, Valkyrie." He said and I nodded numbly. He spoke to me as the soothing roar of the kettle filled his shop. "He's just a scared as you are, you know. Even if he isn't showing it."

"But babies, I don't know if I even want babies. I mean, I do, I really, really do, but I don't. I'm terrified, Ghastly." I said as he handed me my tea. "I mean, Kenspeckle explained how it would work. They'd get DNA from Skulduggery and do some things and I'd end up with a baby, but what would it even be? They can't even tell me that."

Ghastly sipped his own tea then looked at me. "And you're afraid it would take after the father, that you'd have a baby skeleton?"

"Actually I'm afraid if the baby didn't look like him that I couldn't love it. Maybe this is a mistake. I don't want to be home minding the baby while he's out having fun."

Ghastly sighed. "Have you told him any of this?" He asked and at my helpless shrug he nodded. "I thought as much. Skulduggery wants something and you're willing to cave in and give it to him whether it makes you happy or not. That's no way to start a family, Valkyrie. Your children, if you ever do have them, deserve to be loved and wanted by both of you. Not just him."

I sighed. "I just feel sorry for him at times. He lost his first family, and I do want to be married, but I'm still scared."

"Because you have common sense." Ghastly said gently. "You think I'm not terrified out of my mind, Valkyrie? What if I can't make Tanith happy? What if she gets bored with me? At least you and Skulduggery both enjoy being in the thick of things. I'm a relatively quiet man, a tailor."

"That's part of why she loves you, Ghastly." I said, surprised. "She admires that you can sit down and complete a task. She can do it too, she just doesn't realize it. But she loves you for how different you are from her. And you'll probably get drug into cases by us, you know." I said and he smiled. I went on, trying to piece my thoughts together. "And I guess that's why I love Skulduggery. He's fearless in battle. I'm frightened to death every time I go in. He's a brilliant detective. I just like the fighting part. But we complete each other I guess. Ew. That sounded cheesy, sorry."

Ghastly laughed. "Well, it _is_ sweeter than something you'd normally say. Go home, Valkyrie. Tell him how you feel. Skulduggery might not be happy about it but he is logical, he'll respect your choices if you stand up for yourself." I nodded and went home to find Skulduggery drowsing in his meditation chair.

He had one of my old jackets, something that had been torn to shreds in some forgotten battle in his arms and the sight brought tears to my eyes. Skulduggery adored me. I decided to let him sleep and padded into the kitchen to put the kettle on. I was debating coffee or tea when he joined me.

"Hello." He said, hands stuffed in his pockets.

"Hello yourself. Ghastly showed me the dress, it's beautiful."

"Then those are happy tears in your eyes?" He asked, wrapping his arms around me from behind. I managed a shaky nod and he went on. "Have a seat, I'll make you some tea. Tea is what you need. With lots of sugar."

I laughed and sat. Skulduggery produced several cartons of Chinese take away from the fridge and once I had my tea I dug in, utterly ravenous. I slowed down and looked at him. "Sorry." I said and began eating slower.

"No need to apologize, Valkyrie. So..." He trailed off then cleared his throat nervously, even if he really didn't have one to clear. "I was thinking, we haven't really discussed things, have we? I've just been being a brilliant leader like I always do, and you've just been going along with the flow, but this is different."

"Ghastly called you, didn't he?" I asked and he nodded. "I do want to be married, Skulduggery, but you're right, we haven't talked. I mean, I don't intend to stay home all day while you go off and have adventures, and I don't know if I want babies right away."

"Perish the thought. I never intended to leave you at home. My first wife had no interest into getting into battles. You thought that's what I'd do to you, didn't you? Give you children and leave you at home?"

I nodded and he went on. "No, any down time you have, I share. We'll figure out something. There's always leaving them with the grandparents. Who threatened me with physical harm if I didn't give you children. "You find a way or I'll kill you" I believe those were your father's exact words." Skulduggery tilted his head to show he was teasing and I laughed.

I went back to eating, my mind whirring. "Tanith wasn't there when I visited. I know she's working for the Sanctuary, but-"

"I know, and that's something those two have to stop dancing around. Her being away months at a time on cases, well, that's a great way to wreck a marriage. She has been offered a position as a combat instructor, but I don't see her taking it any time soon."

"Are you saying we nag Corrival into sending her on cases with us?" I asked and Skulduggery grinned broadly in reply.

* * *

The next day I was meeting Tanith for lunch while Skulduggery went to Ghastly's shop. "They're plotting against us I bet." Tanith said cheerfully as we window-shopped. "Oh, look Valkyrie, how pretty!" We were passing a shop that sold replica and fantasy swords and she was drooling over the window display.

"You already have a sword." I pointed out. Tanith didn't bother replying, she just pressed her hands longingly against the glass. And that's when it happened. We were just shopping, two women out having fun and a van rolled by. I turned, noticing it and it seemed like the world was going in slow motion. The side of the van slid open and a figure dressed in black opened fire with a machine gun bolted to the van floor.

I watched the flares of light that the gun spat out with a detached fascination as they slowly pulsed, then time sped up and I barely managed to raise a shield of air in time as mortals screamed and chaos erupted as the window behind us exploded into fragments. Tanith leapt through, dragging me after her and we hunkered down as she called in reinforcements but the van was long gone by the time Sensitives and detectives arrived.

I hadn't even called Skulduggery and Tanith hadn't called Ghastly. We were adults, we were detectives, we didn't need our future husbands rescuing us, but the Bentley pulled up and they leapt out and ran towards us. "Criminy." Tanith muttered under her breath.

Skulduggery ran to me and took me in his arms. "I thought I'd lost you." He said, his arms wrapping tightly around me.

"I'm OK, Skulduggery, just a bit shaken up." I said as I watched our detectives dressed like regular police interview witnesses and investigate the scene. Tanith and I were led away by Skulduggery and Ghastly.

"Well, we might as well go to lunch. They aren't going to let us anywhere near this one at first." Ghastly said and he was right. We were all too close and Corrival wasn't about to let us become a death squad and go for looking for revenge.

* * *

 **Whoa. I swear, I was just listening to jazz. Nice jazz.**


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Tanith, Ghastly, Corrival, Dex, Saracen, Anton, Hopeless, Larrikin, Cleavers or Lord Vile.

* * *

I was trying to hold it together, trying to be brave in front of our friends and Skulduggery as the Bentley went with the flow of afternoon traffic in Dublin. But then in the rear-view mirror I caught sight of Tanith in the back beside Ghastly. She was pale and her blue eyes were wide with shock. She was trying not to cry, just like I was. "Guns are scary." I managed as she looked up and met my gaze.

"Guns are _very_ scary." She said with a vigorous nod and Ghastly agreed.

"You don't have to be so brave, either one of you, you were just shot at."

"But we've been in wars." I said, my voice going higher as tears started to roll down my cheeks. "Sorry." I said as I angrily wiped at my eyes. "Sorry."

"Don't you dare be sorry, Valkyrie." Skulduggery said, glancing over at me. "You should be frightened. Some maniac just shot at you, not caring if he took innocent people along with you. In daylight, Valkyrie, in a public street." He was half way between anger and crying himself.

Ghastly held Tanith as she gave into her tears and Skulduggery pulled smoothly to the curb to hold me as I started to shake. "It's all right now, Valkyrie. You saved both of you."

"But I just stood there like an idiot, Skulduggery! I just stood and stared. I should have reacted faster." I said helplessly.

"Hey, we're OK and that's all that matters." Tanith said from the back as she sat up and wiped her eyes. "Cheer up, Val. I bet we can go back to the shop when this is all over and get the display items at a discount." She said and we both laughed.

I sat up too and looked back at her. "Deal. I could do with some shopping." I said with a shaky smile. Skulduggery and Ghastly just stared at us uncertainly but we assured them we were fine and we were. The shock had come and gone, we'd lived. It would always be a scary moment and maybe we'd have nightmares, but we had survived.

They escorted us to lunch, and Ghastly stepped away to answer his mobile at the same time Skulduggery did, though they stayed where they could see us. "You know something? I feel sorrier for them." I said and Tanith nodded her agreement.

They returned and Ghastly cleared his throat. "No sign of the van or shooter so you have one of two choices. The Sanctuary or the Sanctuary."

"Wait, that's one choice." I said with a frown.

"Right you are, Val." He agreed. "But you need to be safe. We should have time enough to eat, considering we also have agents here, but after that it's into a nice safe van and we get escorted there." Tanith and I sighed but we listened.

We were escorted to the throne room when Corrival sat looking tense and weary, flanked by Dex and Saracen. A new body guard stood beside Corrival and he swept his unsmiling gaze over the Cleavers that had accompanied us. He turned his gaze to me and smiled gently. "How are you, Valkyrie?" Anton asked.

"OK, now." I said with a slight shrug and he nodded.

"I've been assigned to guard Corrival or you'd never leave my sight. Skulduggery will guard you though, and Ghastly is to accompany Miss Low at all times. You're here for the duration, I'm afraid."

Corrival grunted. "We could swap, Valkyrie. You're the only person Anton actually likes." He grumbled. "Will he let me out to go get my own cakes and crosswords? No, I'm trapped here the same as the rest of you."

"We assume it was an attack on the Dead Men, then?" Skulduggery asked and Corrival nodded. He sighed and looked at me. "You're getting to pay for our sins, Valkyrie."

"And Hopeless and Larrikin?" I asked. Corrival smiled grimly.

"Infirmary. They didn't fare quite as well as you two did, but they will live. I'll let you go see them once we're through here." He said, then turned his attention to Skulduggery. "Guns, only guns. No trace of magic on the bullets we've found at any of the crime scenes. Ideas?"

The way he said any of the crime scenes made my blood run cold. But Skulduggery looked thoughtful. "Not sure, could be a new bad guy, that's always a possibility. Though he did shoot out the windows of Ghastly's shop, which wasn't nice at all."

"You were shot at and didn't tell me?" I asked sharply.

"Why on earth do you think we got there so quickly, Valkyrie? Same thing at each scene, a gunman in a van with a machine gun mounted inside. Attacks at three locations that we know of. And we can only assume something is lying in wait for those who haven't been shot at yet. Unless, unless it was just a warning and we weren't meant to be killed." He stared at the floor hard as if it held the answers, but I didn't think he'd get any.

* * *

Hopeless and Larrikin were stable by the time we could see them, and well on their way to healing up entirely in the mud baths. Hopeless was doing his best to look tough, but Larrikin had no problems getting the staff to bring him coffee. "This is the life, Val." He said as he settled back into the mud bath. "Adventure, excitement, pretty girls giving me mud baths." He said, looking at the attendant who just narrowed her eyes at him and left.

I laughed at his dismay and he grinned at me good-naturedly. "Have a seat." He patted the area beside the bath and I went to sit by him.

"Larrikin, she is spoken for." Skulduggery said and Larrikin laughed.

"Val's like a kid sister to me, Skulduggery. And I want to hear from my kid sister all about her big adventure." I smiled, realizing what he was doing. Larrikin was comforting me in his own way, helping my put the shooting in perspective.

I told him what I'd already told detectives and seemingly everyone else and he listened patiently. I frowned slightly. "Lord Vile didn't warn me. Why wouldn't he?" I asked and Larrikin shrugged.

We all looked at Skulduggery.

"What is the end game of the Vile that infected you, Valkyrie? He wants you there. It would be in his best interest to see the Vile in this world fail to be there for you. It would also be a test."

"Why do I think the Vile in this world hates him very much?" I asked with a smile and he grinned at me.

"That he does. But you handled yourself well. Sometimes time seems to slow down in a battle, but we'll be doing further testing, making sure these maniacs don't have a type of magic we've never heard of. Look at it this way, Val, a brand new adventure awaits the Dead Men." He said cheerfully.

"Oh, utter joy." I said dryly and he laughed.

* * *

 **A tad short, but to the point, I think.**


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Larrikin, Hopeless, Ghastly, Tanith, Kenspeckle, Dusk, or Cleavers.

* * *

Larrikin turned to me with a grin and his grin went feral. Before I could react he lunged at me, his muscles growing and his bones cracking even as his fangs grew in and his skin tore to shreds. I brought my arm up to protect my throat and he bit down hard. I screamed and he reversed direction, dragging me into the mud bath where mud invaded my open mouth.

I barely let my skin flow away in time. But he was strong, too strong and he wrenched first one of my arms from the socket and then the other. I opened my mouth in a scream and then he was gone and I was struggling to get to the surface. I sat up drunkenly in time to see Ghastly and Skulduggery holding Hopeless down with air shields as Tanith held her sword at the ready. Larrikin's lifeless corpse lay in one corner like a discarded rag doll and when the man who had killed him turned around it was as if time had stopped.

Dusk looked at me and smiled. "I still bear you no ill will." He looked amused, if anything, and when Cleavers arrived to contain Hopeless he left with them.

Skulduggery rushed over and helped me out of the bath, threading my arms back into my sleeves. "This won't hurt a bit." He lied as he pushed my arms back into place. It hurt so bad I couldn't even scream. I just sat there as he manipulated the mud from me and got me clean and dry. I looked at him tiredly.

Kenspeckle came running in too late with test results on the bullets. Skulduggery listened then nodded grimly. "So vampires managed to accelerate the disease and coat the bullets with it. Now we know what their game is. They didn't need to get all of us at once. They knew we'd retreat here and there was every possibility that there would be five newly fledged vampires on the loose. Clever."

Kenspeckle nodded his agreement then insisted on testing us. When it was clear we were all clean he sighed. "I'll need Larrikin's body for further testing. I am sorry for your loss." He said gruffly then walked out. I stared at Skulduggery who shrugged.

"Stupid vampires." Tanith said bitterly. "What are they going to do with Hopeless then?" She demanded and Skulduggery shrugged helplessly.

"That depends on him, Tanith. If he can learn to control himself he would make a valuable asset. If not, he'll be spending quite a lot of time in a private cell, I'm sorry."

Ghastly led her out and Skulduggery cocked his head at me as he stuffed his hands in his pockets. "Well?"

"Other than the getting my arms ripped off part that was fun." I admitted and he nodded in satisfaction.

"That's my girl. Now we get to go into the Hall of Magical Cabinets and look for likely suspects." He said gleefully and I sighed.

* * *

We were both looking, Skulduggery needing the help. It was slow, boring work. "Any thoughts on our ring leader?" Skulduggery asked. I thought a bit before answering.

"He either knows science or has a scientist on his side, more than likely a lot of them. He'd need serum to keep the vampires in control and the expertise to make the disease more infectious, at the least."

"Good, what else?" He asked and when I shrugged he sighed. "He's intelligent, Valkyrie. We've been observed without realizing it and had you all been infected the Sanctuary would be in shambles now, destroyed from the inside. He knew he didn't need all of us. You most likely survived because you were meant to."

I swallowed and nodded. Then I remembered something. "The man who shot at us. He didn't move much, but when he did, he was graceful, too graceful. Vampires with guns? Why not just surprise us one day?"

Skulduggery gave an annoyed grunt. "You know why. Did we even think to test for an infection of any sort? You'd have all changed at roughly the same time. Even with just two it was pure luck they changed where and when they did. Think, Valkyrie, if this virus is accelerated it might keep accelerating. One scratch, one bite and whoever is behind this would have chaos in the streets."

"I'm sorry about Larrikin." I said and he looked at me.

"Don't be. He had the reaction to the virus he was supposed to, but he also had a choice, Valkyrie. He chose to attack. He most likely felt he was changing, they both did, but they chose to change. That's not normal and you know that. But at least this means we're facing a challenge worthy of my genius."

I looked at him and nodded slowly. Skulduggery was swinging from anger to happiness too quickly. It was like his mood swings from years ago and suddenly I didn't want to be anywhere near him. I shrugged off the feeling and kept an eye on him as we worked. I knew he was insane, I knew that. But it never failed to surprise me when it showed for some reason. "Sorry." He said after a while.

"Don't be." I said, feeling hurt. Skulduggery put a gentle hand on my shoulder then bundled me into him. "Something really frightened you, didn't it?" I asked and he nodded.

"I feel like I'm three steps behind whoever did this, and I can't protect you if that is true." I punched his arm and he whined. "What is that for?" He asked, rubbing it.

"There's no winning or loosing, remember? You taught me that. There is won or lost and we keep fighting until we have won." I growled and he clapped in admiration.

"I'd say "That's the spirit." but I always mean that sarcastically. Ah, well. Let's knock off and get you some coffee and a snack, eh?"

I grinned my agreement and soon we were walking to the cafeteria. We weren't holding hands or even linked arm in arm, but we didn't need to be to feel close. Skulduggery seemed to be thinking the same thing. "Anyone who saw us together would say we aren't in love." He sounded amused and he tilted his head in a smile.

I shrugged. "We aren't touchy-feely people. It would just feel, well, stupid to just start clinging to you or doing all those cutesy couple things that turn my stomach."

Skulduggery laughed. "Could a fellah at least put his arm around you? Just as your partner, of course?" He asked and I blushed slightly but agreed. It was nice, it just seemed, well, silly. We weren't the type to do all those sorts of things together. Skulduggery wasn't sweetly affectionate or mushy and I hoped he never would be.

As he got me settled with coffee and a pastry he watched me contentedly, then started drawing patterns on the table with a gloved hand. "You OK?" I asked and he looked up at me.

"Mm? Yes, dandy."

"Skulduggery, are you saying you want to do more couple-ly things?" I asked and he shook his head.

"No, no. Wouldn't dream of it." He said, though by the smitten way he looked at me I knew he was dreaming of it. "Though, if you wanted to, well then!"

"Are you trying a really bad Jimmy Stewart impression on me?"

"No?" He said and I laughed.

"OK, you're right, we should do more things like that. I just don't want to turn into one of those mushy couples that give one another pet names."

"Perish the thought, Pookie."

"Skulduggery!" I yelled.

"Snookums? Cupcake? Crumpet? Valkyrie, fireballs are not called for." Skulduggery said with a laugh then ducked as I lobbed fire at his head. "My, my! So fierce!" He teased. Skulduggery rose to his feet smoothly, adjusted his tie and put his fedora on at a suitably rakish angle.

"The files await. Shall we, my dear?" He asked, ginning hugely as he held out a gloved hand and grinning back I took it.

* * *

 **What? Don't look at me like that. We had too many Dead Men. And Larrikin died for science. Besides, I telegraphed that punch chapters ago.**


	20. Chapter 20

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Hopeless, Cleavers, Billy-Ray, China, Wreath, Ghastly, Tanith, Corrival or Anton.

* * *

We were working in the Hall of Magical Cabinets where we heard and alarm go off. Skulduggery jerked his head up. "There's been a break out." He said and we raced to the gaol in time to see a snarling Hopeless toss a Cleaver against a wall. He crouched down low, and snarled. Skulduggery calmly took his revolver out as the Cleaver staggered. The Cleaver found his balance and charged again, scythe flashing.

Hopeless moved neatly to one side and grabbed him by the arm but the Cleaver pivoted into the grab, his scythe flashing upwards and Hopeless made a gagging sound as his eyes went wide in surprise. His head dropped to the floor with a sickening thud and I watched in horror as his body followed. I laughed nervously and Skulduggery looked at me sharply. Workers arrived from the morgue and he sighed and watched as Hopeless was taken away. "I don't like this, Valkyrie. Someone had to let him out." Skulduggery said as he stepped forward and started questioning the prisoners and guards.

No one had seen anything, and they couldn't remember anyone having been there. My blood iced over and I went to the security room where video cameras monitored the gaol. But there was nothing on the tapes for the time when Hopeless was released. No one had approached his cell. Unless of course someone had fooled with the tapes and looped the feed.

I remembered something Anton said and went to find him. "Anton, what did you mean by five of them, five of us?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I don't know. Maybe someone told me, but I can't remember who." He stared at me then nodded grimly. Skulduggery had joined us and he shook his head in disagreement.

"As much as I'd love the chance to kill him all over again, Valkyrie, Erskine can't be behind this. His soul was used up, remember?"

"But it makes sense." I argued. "Serpine, Billy-ray and now Dusk? They were just distractions someone sent back to cover his own return. And what if Anton's right? Then Erskine is back and has anyone he likes to help him."

"Nonsense!" Skulduggery said angrily. "It's not Erskine, Valkyrie! This all took time, planning. Someone who was alive to set things in motion."

"And he couldn't have done all of this as one more plan? You know he'd benefit from us being gone, Skulduggery!" We were both angry now. "He already gotten two of us, isn't that enough to open your eyes? Oh, that's right, you don't have any."

Skulduggery stiffened and looked at me. "As the Dead Man in charge in the field and as your partner I'm relieving you of duty. Find a quiet corner and try to stay out of the way of the investigation." He turned his back on me then and it was only Ghastly's arrival that prevented a full blown magical battle.

He and Tanith walked me back to his office. "What is going on between you two?" Ghastly asked and I shrugged helplessly.

"I don't know, Ghastly. We're both angry because we failed Hopeless, because it's like whoever is behind this is laughing at us. Wait, I'm remembering something, there was a blip on the tapes..."

"I'll have it looked into, Val." Ghastly assured me, handing me a hot tea. I nodded my thanks and while the was making calls Tanith looked at me worriedly.

"You don't look so hot. Maybe Skulduggery's right. Take some time off."

"I saw two men I cared about change into vampires and get killed, Tanith." I said angrily. "And what about the rest of you? I'm not even on the case now. I can't do anything. I should have stayed in America." I said bitterly.

"That's the spirit." Skulduggery said softly from behind me. "It occurred to me you'd find a way around my orders. Good girl. It's this case, Val. It's called being the leader. My men are dropping like flies and I'm terrified it will just keep happening."

"Maybe this is what we get for cheating." I said bleakly.

He came to where I could see him and leaned against Ghastly's desk with his hands in his pockets. "So you think the universe is punishing us? Because I don't. We might have had our greed and stupidly get us into this mess, but it has nothing to do with a judgmental bit of space." He said lightly.

"What then?" Tanith asked and as if on cue Solomon appeared.

"I'll take it from here." He said and Skulduggery nodded. "None of us, even in the temples thought to question exactly _how_ you got into the land of the dead. There are many ways, after all. And we didn't think to do anything but watch and see if you succeeded, clearly there were questions we should have been asking from the beginning."

"Such as who gave us the chance, right? Made it all possible?" I asked and he nodded.

"Correct. It obviously wasn't someone of their side of the veil, but ours. It may have been China, but I believe someone counted on her greed and ambition to blind her as it blinded all of us. No, this is someone far more calculating, someone who perhaps wanted a distraction."

"So who?" Skulduggery asked and Solomon looked at him. "Tell me, detective, what is a soul, exactly? Is it the same thing as you consciousness? No, it's two separate things, isn't it?" He turned to me. Consider it like this, Valkyrie, kept together the soul and consciousness combined keep bringing the same person back again and again. It's how your friends look like you remember them. But what if they separated and only one half came back?"

"Then Erskine could have hijacked any soul?"

"Perhaps, much like a Remnant. Or he doesn't need a body. If he was still aware after being thrown into that machine how long would it take for a man like him to worm his way out of it? Perhaps into other machines, perhaps into a person where he'd lay dormant. Waiting."

"That's a cheerful thought." Skulduggery said grimly. "There how do we stop him? How, Solomon?" Solomon smiled and pressed a finger to his lips then was gone in a swirl of shadows. "Well, that was helpful." Skulduggery growled.

He turned to frown at me. "How did he even manage to teach you anything?" Before I could reply Solomon had reappeared and grabbed me. His shadows rose up around us and we were in a dimly lit temple.

"Sorry, but we have to assume your Sanctuary is compromised. Mr. Sanguine hadn't been around in a while, has he?" He asked and I mentally kicked myself for having assumed he could take care of himself.

"He's dead?"

"Quite. Don't ask how I know but Skulduggery should be hearing about the discovery of his body now, Valkyrie. Burn it, and the others. There's too much we don't understand going on here." He said and only once I agreed did he take me back. The bodies were burned and Corrival seemed at a loss for what to do.

Billy-Ray's neck had been snapped as if someone with enough training had gotten the jump on him and as far as we knew only a Dead Man had that kind of training, unless we had a rouge Cleaver on our hands. Anyone, after all, could be in those suits. They were all checked, half the Sanctuary was investigating the other half and things were looking bleak.

"Then it's one of us?" Skulduggery asked as we all gathered together. "One of us is either killing off the others for his own reasons or he's possessed, which I don't believe for a second."

We all looked at one another uneasily. If it was Erskine behind everything there was no way of knowing if this was just his past planning unfolding, or he had somehow come back. A tech came in, looking bleary-eyed. "We checked the footage, there's something you should see."

We all went to the security room where I'd first watched the footage. An order was given and it played on the big screen. Slowed down frame by frame we could see the distortion came from the appearance of a figure who unlocked the door then turned and smiled at the camera. I looked at him, not wanting to believe it was true. But Erskine Ravel calmly smiled at the camera then vanished.

* * *

 **I hate technology. Hopefully this posting sticks.**


	21. Chapter 21

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Corrival, Erskine, or Dex. Ruvik and Victoriano are my OCs but obviously I don't own The Evil Within or any of the characters. The story is about to go to Crazy Town and I'm the mayor.

* * *

We were all in the security room just watching the monitors when a frazzled detective ran in. "Sir!" He said to Corrival. "We have the Americans wanting a com link now." Corrival frowned and waved impatiently for it to be brought up. While a connection was made two handcuffed and shackled people were escorted in.

The American Grand Mage narrowed her eyes and looked at them. "I want those two psychotics shipped back _now_. They were slated for execution and escaped!"

"You say psychotic like it's a bad thing." The woman in handcuffs said and her taller partner laughed. They were both slim, tall, and they looked a lot alike. Though the man had black curly hair and jade green eyes, and he seemed cunning and dangerous where the woman looked downright normal. "And that's Detective Psychotic to you." The woman added gleefully.

Corrival looked at her questioningly. "We're normal, It's the American Sanctuary that's FUBAR. They watched too many Star Trek movies." She said with a frown.

"You're partner is a demon!" The Grand Mage roared and the two detectives in chains looked at one another and laughed. Corrival broke communications and looked at them for several moments.

"He's not a demon." The woman said, amused. "Nor am I. We knew they were closing in they wanted to kill my partner and I took exception to that."

"Well, they wanted to kill you too." He pointed out and she nodded. "And I'd say the correct word for me would be deactivate."

"Ruvik!" The woman scolded, then sighed. "This," she titled her head to her partner, "is Detective Ruben, aka Ruvik. Maybe not the best Taken Name but we were in a bit of a time crunch."

Corrival grunted. "And you?" He asked and gestured for them to be set free.

"Victoriano, but you call me Vicky. Obviously not my original Taken name but I had no choice but to Take another."

"That's not possible, is it?" I asked and she shrugged as she rubbed her wrists.

" _He_ shouldn't be possible." She jerked her thumb towards her partner, "yet there he is. "We're connected, hence having to Take one name together we could both think of while running from people shooting at us."

"That's what you get for giving me part of your life force." Ruvik said, clearly amused. "But you couldn't just let me hit the sea and die a natural death, could you?" He smiled fondly at her then looked at us, making an odd whirring sound. "Long story short? I'm her camera and she's my photographer."

"What?" Dex asked and he turned to Dex with an amused smile.

"You want me to morph back and forth? What would that prove, exactly?"

"OK, assuming what you say is true, how did this happen and why does the American Sanctuary want you both dead?" I asked.

Vicky sighed. "I didn't exactly tell the Sanctuary when I signed up for duty that I'm half witch. I hid that side of my magic quite well until a few months ago. I was doing some shots on a cliff side overlooking the sea. The edge of the cliff collapsed and I barely caught on but it meant dropping my camera. And I screamed his name as he fell."

"And that was enough for me to turn human." Ruvik put in. "Well, that and her grabbing for me. The Sanctuary was thrilled at first. Told us things like this happened all the time. It turns out they don't. Cameras and other machines, in general, don't become humans no matter what magic is passed through them. We don't know what happened either, though we have our theories."

"So, you're like the Borg?" I asked and he laughed.

"Not exactly. Have you ever been around a machine long enough to feel a presence, detective, a personality?" He asked and I nodded. "I am, for lack of a better term, that personality. I don't depend on the camera any more than what makes you you depends on your body for existence. Destroy our shells and we'll still be left."

"That makes sense. But why kill you, why not study you? Sorry." I said and he looked at me and smiled.

"I am still a camera in a way. I'd already bonded to and answer only to Vicky." He turned to look at her. "That name doesn't quite suit you. How about Cat or Kitty?"

"I should have let you hit the salt water." She said dryly and they smiled fondly at one another. "What scatterbrain is trying to say is that he wouldn't listen. They tried arresting us but we've played enough horror games to know that's generally a bad thing. And it's a pity; he notices things most other detectives don't."

"Well, we're down two. Although we could be paranoid and say this is too covenient for you two to just show up here seeking asylum, I'm going to trust you." Corrival said and they nodded.

"Grand Mage, you should know our former employer had been watching machines like crazy. When Ruvik came to life she thought she'd found the person she was looking for. I didn't know what that means, but we didn't like it." Vicky offered

"We know exactly what it means, Detectives. Please see the Administrator for your new duties." He said. They nodded and left. We were all staring at him, awaiting an explanation.

"Now we know Erskine is back and we know where he intends to go next. He must be trapped here, in the building, in the machines. I'd say we'd cut the power but from what Ruvik said that won't work. Any suggestions?"

"We destroy the Sanctuary?" Skulduggery asked and Corrival nodded grimly.

* * *

 **Boom! I'm imagining this is all going to go horribly wrong and destroying the Sanctuary is the very last thing they want to do.**


	22. Chapter 22

A/N: I don't own Skulduggery, Valkyrie, Kenspeckle, Anton, Corrival, Tanith, Ghaslty or Erskine.

* * *

Skulduggery and I stood with everyone else from the Sanctuary and watched as the whole thing was just gone with a soft _whump_. Kenspeckle nodded in satisfaction. "I'm no demolition expert but if he was trapped there everything was vaporized and he had no chance to exit. He's gone now, truly gone."

Our new detectives exchanged worried glances but remained silent. "What?" I asked and Ruvik shook his head.

"As the saying goes: you shouldn't oughta done that. Now whatever you had trapped in the machines is free."

Kenspeckle snorted. "Next you'll be telling us machines have feelings. You just a disturbed, unhappy man who lives in a fantasy world. You really _believe_ you were a camera, don't you? It figures America would send us the rejects."

Ruvik leaned forward to stare at him intently but said nothing. He exchanged glances with his partner who nodded. They split up, both walking among the crowd with their right hands out as if they were reading the air. The returned and Ruvik took something out of Kenspeckle's pocket, amused. "There's your man. Well man in the machine now." He held out Kenspeckle's mobile where the face of Erskine was contorted in anger.

He handed the mobile back, made a rather insulting series of sounds that made his partner laugh and the pair melted into the crowd.

I turned to Skulduggery who just shrugged. "He's obviously not human, Valkyrie. Did you see the way he moved? The way they both moved? They depend on one another, work together. It was like they had a silent communication going on even when they were apart." He said, sounding a tad envious.

"Do you think he's a vampire? That they both are?" I asked and Skulduggery shrugged.

"I don't know, and it doesn't matter I suppose." He turned to Kenspeckle. "Promise me you kept that mobile locked up tightly until we can figure out a way to contain Erskine." He said and Kenspeckle nodded. The crowd broke up, the detectives drifting off, grumbling about being out of work.

"I still don't get how Erskine became solid enough to work on a cell door." I said as Skulduggery and I walked to the Bentley.

"What?" He asked. "No, I mean it, repeat what you just said."

"How did he become solid enough to open a cell door? And if he was trapped in the machines why not go the the American Sanctuary when we had the link up?" Skulduggery's head went back as if I'd slapped him.

"I think he just did." He said dully and we both turned and watched as Kenspeckle fiddled with his mobile.

"Stupid machine." He grumbled. "It just sent a text to America."

* * *

Skulduggery was silent on the drive home. If Erskine had fled to America he was out of our reach and on friendly soil. I still wasn't sure how he'd managed to become solid, but Skulduggery explained. "That disruption we saw in the playback? That was likely Erskine drawing on the power in the Sanctuary. But he did it so well we only saw one camera do anything. I don't like this, not at all."

"Even if he is back, maybe we're over-reacting." I said hopefully and he glanced over at me doubtfully. "Anton said death changes people." I tried and Skulduggery shook his head.

"It didn't change _me_." He pointed out. "The real danger here is that Erskine can go anywhere almost instantly. He can draw on the energy in a given area, attack, then vanish. I'm also thinking the American Sanctuary wanted Ruvik dead so that hopefully Erskine would have body to shunt back to if all was lost."

"But he's human."

"In outward appearance, yes. But I noticed that he never eats or drinks anything and he's downright leery of liquids. It's like he were still a machine and has a good reason to fear getting ruined."

"So she turned him into an android?" I asked doubtfully.

"I don't know, to be honest. No, I do know. He has a human form, he reacts, but he doesn't consider himself human. He mentioned being deactivated, not killed. He doesn't see himself as a person and he isn't, not really. No more than your reflection ever was."

"But my reflection became human."

"But did that make her real? Give her an instant soul?" Skulduggery asked and I sighed. I didn't know, nobody did.

* * *

Skulduggery and I were assigned to keep tabs on our new detectives and the Dead Men split apart once more, Corrival going with Anton. We met the new detectives in a café where Vicky was trying to get Ruvik to drink a latte. "You're going to die if you don't get any nourishment." she growled. "You've already been blacking out, so drink!"

He made a sound like sand crunching in gears and her expression softened. "I'd never hurt you, Ruvik, you know that. Come on, start with this, you should like it."

He took a tentative sip for her then swallowed. "I didn't deactivate." He said in wonder. He took another swallow, then another and she looked amused.

"Told you." She said gently then turned to us. "If you keep an eye on him I'll get more coffee and things. You want anything?" I offered to go up with her and looked at her when we were in line.

"You two are pretty close, aren't you?" I asked and she smiled.

"We are. I can't stand most people but him I like." We ordered and I wondered how they made their escape. Vicky explained that she'd often had Ruvik with her at the Sanctuary and he'd watched and learned after he'd become human. Watched and learned instantly. He'd picked up combat techniques that usually took years to master and he'd mastered several types of magic as well.

Skulduggery was listening intently to something Ruvik was telling him but the men fell silent at our approach. Ruvik looked at Vicky then looked away again nervously. She frowned at him but didn't comment on it. "So." Skulduggery said. "Ruvik was telling me you two are fairly close." I elbowed him one and Ruvik went ashen.

Vicky looked at Ruvik and ruffled his hair fondly. "Yeah, we are. All photographers are close to our cameras." Ruvik looked away and I understood what was going on, even though they both seemed oblivious to how the other one felt.

The pair eventually had to leave to report to Tipstaff and Skulduggery looked at me then led the way to the Bentley. He was silent as he drove, not even reminding me to buckle up. Finally he spoke. "It isn't going to end well for them. He'll slip up and say something eventually. She'll naturally be repulsed as she should be, and it will be over as far as their partnership goes."

"That's sad, and not true, she obviously loves him."

"That's life, Valkyrie. He's just a machine, she should have let him hit the sea and got another. You're acting like he was alive while he was a camera."

"Maybe he was to her."

"So you're saying her insanity justifies her act? That it's just fine and dandy that some nutcase formed an attachment to a _thing_? This is exactly why magic is controlled, Valkyrie. This is why the Americans want her dead. What if she does it again? Hmm? It wouldn't surprise me if his humanity was only a temporary side effect of her wishful thinking."

"What's really bothering you?" I asked and he looked away. "Well?" I asked angrily.

He laughed darkly. "He was a machine, Val. He always will be, in a way. But that magical mistake can give her children. He's been through all sorts of testing. As virile as the next man." I didn't miss the bitterness in his voice that time.

"And you're jealous? Skulduggery, we can have children."

"But you don't want them, do you? I don't think you want to be married to me, either. Maybe it's just to much for us to expect. We have no more right to be together than they do."

"You don't even sound like yourself. We arguing more than we ever have and we can't blame them or the case or anything else. I think you're the one who doesn't want to get married, Skulduggery. Because I'm not your first wife and I ever will be." I regretted it the moment I said it.

"Skulduggery-" I tried but he held up a hand.

"You said you understood." He said quietly.

"And I do. But you keep acting like life was so perfect in the past, back when you were flesh and blood and married to another woman. I can't compete with how perfect you've made that time and place, Skulduggery, no one could."

"Then maybe it's a mistake for us to get married. Even for us to be partners."

"Skulduggery!" I punched him in the arm and he whined. "Stop feeling sorry for yourself. This isn't like you. You're usually proud to be a skeleton, remember?"

"True. But you didn't have to hit me so hard, Valkyrie. My first wife wouldn't have hit me so hard." He teased.

"I hate you right now." I growled and he laughed.

"You're right, I do live in the past. I do keep thinking of how much more of a man I was then. But do you know why, Valkyrie Cain? I'll tell you why. I feel bad that I can't offer you the man I was then. Not just being a living man, but I didn't have a violent bone in my body then." I looked at him doubtfully.

"Well, not as many." He amended, smiling at me.

My mobile rang and I answered it frowning. It was Ghastly. "Valkyrie? Are you and Skulduggery all right?" He asked and I could here the panic in his voice.

"Yes, why?"

"I want you to to come to the shop." Skulduggery nodded his agreement and when we got there Ghastly was ashen.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Ruvik and Vicky are dead."

"What? But we just saw them not even a half an hour ago." I protested.

"They were gunned down in a crosswalk. I'm sorry." He said gently and I just felt numb.

"We'd just met them, they were perfect partners and it was clear Ruvik was in love. He wanted a family, children. And Vicky loved him but was too afraid to admit it. They both were too afraid and now they'll never have a chance to be together." I said, hardly noticing when Skulduggery stepped away to make calls. Tanith hugged me to her. "Tell me this is all a bad dream." I said, my voice cracking.

She just held me tighter and when Skulduggery returned somehow I knew he'd given the order to have their bodies destroyed. I felt sick and wondered if we weren't being punished after all. And I knew then I could never marry him. He was too cold, too ruthless, too inhuman and he'd been trying to tell me in his own way.

* * *

 **And two more character come in only to die. The bodies are piling up nicely. And Erskine is on the loose and there is no more Sanctuary. And maybe there is no future for our unhappy couple either. Come on, you all know Valduggery would never happen in the novels. I'm injecting realism into the story.**


	23. Chapter 23

A/N: I don't own Skulduggery, Valkyrie, Ghastly, Tanith or Erskine.

* * *

I was devastated and Skulduggery only stood there and looked at me. Tanith moved away and he came close enough to cup my chin in his gloved hand. "You know I had no choice." He said softly.

"Yes, you did!" I said angrily. "They deserved better, Skulduggery. A proper funeral. No, you just burned them." I said, trying to twist away but he gripped my shoulders and brought his head close to mine, forcing me to gaze into his hollow eye sockets.

"It's what they would have wanted, Valkyrie. Do you think Ruvik would have wanted any chance of Erskine taking over his body? Do you think they would have wanted to be separated even for an instant? And think, Valkyrie. You've seen the other side. They can be together now as they never could in life."

I snuffled and looked at him sullenly. "I know." I said. "It's just that everything is going so wrong." And everything was going wrong, then it wasn't. Skulduggery mobile rang at the same time as the bell over the shop door. Ghastly muttered an apology about not having locked up properly and two people strolled into his living room.

"We're from the American Society of Photography. And I must say, this is _not_ a Kodak moment." The woman said with a frown in her voice, but her lips twitched and them she laughed as I ran to hug her.

"Vicky! But how?" I asked and Ruvik grinned and I went to hug him as well.

"Reflections. We knew very well the real reason they wanted us and if I'm not mistaken your former Grand Mage is no more."

Skulduggery rejoined us. "Erskine is dead a second time, how?" He asked and Ruvik grinned happily.

"We gave him a way to become human again. Or close enough. We knew he couldn't resist but he underestimated his opponents."

"I'm not following" I said and Vicky smiled.

"We had a group of photographers at the Sanctuary. They loved fussing over Ruvik when he changed. And when they heard we were in trouble the hid themselves and waited after helping us escape. The bond between photographer and camera runs deep. Some people get downright homicidal over it."

"Didn't they beat him to death with their bare fists?" Ruvik asked and Vicky nodded.

"Wow." I said. "Then you knew about him all that time? How?"

Ruvik looked at us thoughtfully. "I'll tell you, but first I have something to tell each of you." He said, looking at me intently. "I know there must be times you wondered why he chose you to love. When you don't feel good enough. Maybe you look at other women and worry he's going to want them more. Maybe you look in the mirror and see what you think is wrong with you. Your seeing an illusion. To him you are utter perfection or he wouldn't have chosen you."

He was speaking to me but he glanced over at Vicky while he was talking. "When a man loves a woman she is utter perfection to him. He doesn't care what the world thinks and to him she is the most beautiful woman in the world. And it's his one job to show how how truly amazing she is." He was facing Vicky now who just blinked then gave him a shy smile. "I wouldn't want another photographer. Not now, not ever."

Ruvik smiled fondly at her then gave a glance to Skulduggery. "You have to let her in. You humans have more cold logic and precision than any machine could ever hope for. You have to accept that she picked you out of all the men on the planet and that you are good enough for her. She doesn't want a richer man, a younger one, or even one of flesh and blood. She wants you and only you. It isn't your job to know why, just your job to accept that it's so and be ridiculously and profoundly thankful for it every day. Show her she is your living treasure, show her that each moment with her in completely unforgettable." He murmured softly. He touched Vicky's cheeks with his fingertips gently and she blushed.

"You two make a great couple." Tanith said and they both blushed then Ruvik nodded. Ghastly had us all settled in with tea then ordered some delivery.

"We could all use the break. So how did you know the truth?" He asked and Ruvik sat a little straighter, obviously pleased with himself.

"Observation. Little glitches here and there, tiny power surges and dips. Machines don't have to be aware in the same way a human is to tell you that there's something rotten in Demark. Vicky actually noticed before I did, a lot of the photographers did. They have, well, it isn't magic, but they understand cameras, they can communicate with them."

We looked at Vicky, puzzled. "Everything a camera does is exactly what it was told to do. No exceptions. Most people get angry when they 'act up' but they are only doing what they were told to do either by the manufacturer or the user. Ours started to malfunction, to behave as if they were being controlled by an outside source. What they were doing, in their own way, was screaming that something else was touching them and they didn't like it very much."

"So, when we saw a blip on the feedback?" I asked, then explained it and Ruvik nodded.

"The camera didn't appreciate that power surge as Erskine appeared and the strain it put on the camera any more than you'd enjoy it. In it's own way it was speaking to you. Not an awareness like yours, but a language if you knew how to listen."

"And you did." Skulduggery put in. "If you hadn't had us check the feedback again... I can't believe it, you found a clue before I did." He sounded dismayed then brightened and cuddled me into him. "That's my girl."

The delivery arrived and we all devoured our food except for Skulduggery who was happy to watch me eat. He and Ruvik exchanged glances after the meal and Ruvik nodded smartly then turned to Vicky. He produced a tiny ring then grinned at her sheepishly. "It was the best I could do on short notice, but as it held my strap to my body, I'm hoping you know it means the world to me. Since, you know, you have a habit of dropping me off cliffs." He said and they were both laughing and crying happy tears as he slipped it on her pinkie finger. "Until I can get you something worthy of you." He said softly and Tanith and I sighed happily. "Will you?" He asked, looking at her like she was the most beautiful woman in the world and Vicky nodded, too emotional to speak.

Ruvik kissed her chastely then bundled her into him as he faced us. I felt a tiny sliver of envy. They were just perfect together, and Ruvik caught my look. "We weren't always this close. Had I been human there would have been a lot of attacking one another and rolling on the floor fighting. She wanted what all photographers want. A DSLR that way far above her price range and I didn't take being her consolation prize too well. She kept mourning the camera that got away, and I kept acting up to show my displeasure."

"So what happened?" Ghastly asked.

"We reached a compromise. Photographers will always dream of other cameras, they want and love and desire every one they see and that is as it should be. But the longer she tried me out, the more I showed her I could do and she started to actually listen to what I had to teach her, the more she realized I was a lot more camera than she'd bargained for. When I could feel it in the way she held me, the way she treated me, we began to work together and we bonded."

"What are your plans until the Sanctuary rebuilds?" Ghastly asked. "I have a spare bedroom upstairs, nothing fancy, with your names on it. We could do with the company, to be honest." He offered and the couple exchanged a look then nodded. "And don't you dare offer to pay." He added and they both smiled gratefully.

Skulduggery and I left at last, weary as we climbed into the Bentley. I yawned and stretched, then settled into my seat and closed my eyes. "Are you OK?" I murmured and he chuckled.

"I'm good, actually. It isn't every day we get to meet someone nearly as brilliant as me. I'd have solved the case sooner, had I been in America."

"I know."

"Just so you know." Skulduggery said then put the Bentley in drive. "Seatbelt." He murmured and I opened my eyes to buckle up sleepily. "He was right, you know. I'll never be able to be overly mushy, and I've held back because I didn't think you'd appreciate me telling you more often, but I do love you, Valkyrie."

"I love you too, Skulduggery." I said, blushing slightly. "I like them, they're a lot like us. I imagine when they get married a lot of people aren't going to be happy, and I think that will make them laugh at those people, won't it?"

"It will. I said a lot of nasty things because I was having a royal sulk over being what I am now instead of what I was. I was jealous too, but since I know you love me as I am, that I don't lack anything that it would take to make you love me more, I apologize."

"Wow." I said sarcastically and Skulduggery laughed guiltily then smiled at me from behind his disguise.

"You know this is just the beginning for us, right? That many more adventures await?"

"I know." I said gently and he flashed me another smile.

"Just so you know."

* * *

 **I can leave it there or go on. But if I leave it there we don't have to attend their wedding, and who likes going to weddings anyhow?**


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Tanith, Ghastly, Corrival or the Dead Men.

* * *

It was a few days before our wedding and Tanith, Ghastly, Skulduggery and I were meeting Vicky and Ruvik on a rooftop. The men would go one way for the day and we women another. As we exited onto the windy rooftop I frowned. Vicky was there alone, a camera bag to one side and a camera mounted on a tripod.

She peered through the viewfinder and it was like watching another person take over. She became intent and still as a statue, only her hands moving. They glided back and forth while she made adjustments. Then she just went still for the longest time before she finally took some photos and stood back with a smile. She waved to us and we all walked over. "Where's Ruvik?" Skulduggery asked as Vicky took the camera off the tripod.

She grinned. "Hold this." She said, handing the camera to Skulduggery. He did and a second later Ruvik was standing in his arms.

"You masher, you." He said cheekily, then laughed and steeped out of Skulduggery's embrace. "Sorry, but that never gets old." He said and Skulduggery tilted his head in a smile. Ruvik turned to Vicky.

"He had his hand on my lens barrel. I've been violated." He said and they both snorted laughter.

We women took off, Vicky giggling. "Sorry, he's all of three-years-old some days. It's hard to believe what a brilliant detective he is." She said fondly.

"Skulduggery's the same way. He's such a moron some times. But that's why we love them, isn't it? They're playful." I said and Vicky nodded.

"I wish Ghastly would be more playful." Tanith said wistfully. "I mean, he's wonderful and everything, but playful isn't a word I'd ever apply to him."

Vicky cocked her head thoughtfully. "It's there, I've seen it when you're together. It's just subtle, and subtle can be a wonderful thing. Speaking of wonderful things, it was sweet of the men to spend the day with him, it's appreciated."

"I think it's more them getting to spend the day with him, Vicky." Tanith said reassuringly. "I don't know what America was like, but it's clear he can charm anyone and the men already like him."

Vicky gave us a relieved smile and I knew not to pry. I already knew what having an unusual partner was all about. Some people treated Skulduggery like a thing, like he was an it and not a he, and it drove us both crazy even though Skulduggery pretended to ignore it.

* * *

The days flew by and I was in a room in the Sanctuary with Vicky and Tanith helping me into my wedding dress. "You look beautiful!" Vicky enthused, stepping back to admire me.

Tanith smiled and nodded her agreement. I just stared at myself in the mirror. My black dress had a dark glamour to it, and with the veil on I looked like a Gothic heroine. I smiled at the idea. What did I think was going to happen? Skulduggery would be abducted and I'd have to go to the rescue in my dress? I laughed nervously, but I was ready by the time Ghastly arrived to escort me to Corrival's office. He looked handsome in his tuxedo and I wanted to tell him he was, but I couldn't do anything but smile nervously as I took his arm.

We got to the Grand Mage's office and I just stopped and took it all in. My parents were there, The Dead Men were there and it just all seemed like a dream to me. _I'm going into shock._ I though dully. Ghastly walked me forward ever so gently, but it felt like we weren't even moving. I was terrified, I'd have rather been going into battle than getting married. I swallowed by my mouth was dry and I wanted nothing more than for it all to be over.

Skulduggery turned to me with a pleased tilt of his head and I just stared. He was wearing a tuxedo that seemed woven of shadows and a shirt and tie of deepest sable. The hat tilted down rakishly over one eye just completed the picture and I almost fainted like the first time I'd seem him. In contrast to his clothes his skull gleamed a bright white and as he tilted his head down to stare at me I got a sudden burst of nerves.

"Easy, Val." Ghastly rumbled comfortingly as he stepped away and my father stepped forward to give me away. Somehow I managed to walk forward to Skulduggery, trying to ignore the fear in my belly. The Dead Men were here, our friends were here and my parents. We were in the Sanctuary nothing bad was going to happen. I looked around the room for Cleavers, frowning when I didn't see any, then chided myself.

I had to relax before I hyperventilated. I was shaking by the time we reached Skulduggery and he gave me a reassuring smile. "Be brave." He murmured through closed teeth.

"I hate 'Be brave.' It always means you have a rubbish plan." I hissed back.

Corrival was saying something but even though I looked at him I could hardly make out the words. He paused with a frown as if he couldn't hear himself and a wave of energy pulsed through the room, knocking us all to the floor. A blinding light accompanied it, and when I could at last open my eyes Skulduggery was gone.

* * *

 **It was almost a wedding, right?**


	25. Chapter 25

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Corrival, Anton, Ghastly, Tanith, Serpine, China, Kenspeckle or the Dead Men.

* * *

I was stunned and numb, but the Dead Men were already moving, Corrival barking out orders while Vicky and Ruvik examined the area where Skulduggery had been standing. Ruvik looked furious and he spoke to Vicky in a series of clicks and whirrs that she clearly understood. She nodded, looking grim and dangerous.

I realized then that must have been what made her a good detective. Most of the time she looked unassuming, like an average person. But now as she stood and conferred with Ruvik I could see why the new Grand Mage of the American Sanctuary wanted her back. She was intent and nodded sharply to whatever his plan was.

Ruvik clapped his hands sharply for attention and all the chaos in the room settled. "Time is of the essence. Is professor Kenspeckle on his way?" He asked, then continued as Kenspeckle hurried into the room holding a small device. "This will work for all of us?" He asked and Kenspeckle glowered at him.

"Of course it will work! How dare you-" Kenspeckle spluttered and Ruvik leaned in dangerously close.

"Shut and up." He said softly and Kenspeckle went wide-eyed but fell silent. Then Ruvik had us all gather together and he activated the device. There was a flash of light and we were back in the land of the dead. Ruvik looked back and forth slowly as if scanning the area then muttered to himself.

"What?" I asked.

"Our destination is yonder." He said, pointing to a hulking castle made of black rock I didn't remember being there before. "No doubt fortified but-" He looked at me thoughtfully. "Whatever happens, no matter what you see, you are to trust me, all right?" He asked and I nodded. Ruvik put gentle hands on my shoulders. "I mean it, Valkyrie. Your every instinct will be to attack but you have to swear you won't or I'm leaving you here."

"OK, I promise." I said and he and Vicky led the way since the obviously knew more about this than they felt like telling us. We reached the castle to find the drawbridge down and the heavy gate up. The doors were open and even I felt how wrong it all was.

"I don't suppose you're going to tell us what's going on before we go in there?" Ghastly grumbled. "Who has him? Serpine?"

Ruvik looked at him. "No, not Serpine. I must give you all the same instructions. You are not to engage any combatants or do anything but follow us."

"Then why bring us? Why not mount this rescue mission yourself?" Ghastly asked, exasperated. Ruvik looked away, then back at him. "I think you know why. There are choices to be made, Mr. Bespoke." He led the way across the drawbridge and I could only wonder what me meant.

* * *

We didn't encounter anyone, strangely enough, and as we descended into the chilly dungeon I was grateful for the fireballs many of us held aloft. We wandered through twisting hallways and when we came out to a central area Vicky and Ruvik grabbed me to keep me from charging forward. "The floor's an illusion." Ruvik said softly. He waved his hand and I could see the pit of spikes I would have plunged into. But I wasn't thinking right, All I could think about was what was across that gap.

Skulduggery was tied to a frame on the left of the other side and his family was tied up on the right. Looking as regal as ever China sat on a throne in the middle. "Valkyrie, how lovely of you to join us!" She said sweetly and for a moment I actually believed her. "I was just telling Skulduggery that we need to get together more often. You've been missed."

"Please. Take me, don't hurt them. Don't hurt him." I begged and she laughed.

"Am I hurting anyone?" She asked coyly. "Stretching is very beneficial, you know. No, what I'm doing is what I always do, my dear."

"What's best for you." I said dully and she smiled brightly.

Skulduggery said nothing but just hung with his head down. He family was eerily silent. I wondered if they were even alive or if she'd killed then one more time. In the midst of all this Ruvik called over to China in a series of clicks and whirrs. I realized he was laughing at her.

Then he did laugh. "You know something? Magical science is a wonderful thing. When we found out who our old Grand Mage was working with to open a portal to your land we had to wonder _why_. So we did it too. Only faster and better. And thanks to the wonders of DNA and magical science we were able to produce some amazing prototypes. They almost seem real, don't they?" He asked tauntingly.

China looked at Skulduggery's family. "They aren't reflections, I'd know it." She hissed.

Kenspeckle stepped forward. "No, consider them akin to a printed 3D model. We had to invade some people memories, but sacrifices must be made for science, don't you agree?"

"Then you won't mind if I kill them, will you?" She asked and Kenspeckle shrugged.

Ruvik looked at Skulduggery's family. "They're like Cracker Jacks. There's a prize hidden inside. Activate." He spoke the command clearly and both their heads snapped up. Their eyes glowed bright white and menacing whirrs and clicks came from them. I realized they were cameras, like him and could only stare as they easily broke their bonds then shed their fake skins and advanced on China.

Then they did things to her that defied description and Kenspeckle tossed a device over. The essence of China was sucked in where is whirled about, angry but trapped. One of the cameras, and that's how I thought of them gently untied Skulduggery while another activated a lever, raising a stone floor for us to cross over.

I was over first and helped Skulduggery stand upright. "My family, Valkyrie. They were never here, ever. It was all a joke, a sham." He turned angrily to Ruvik. "Was it worth it? The pain you caused?"

"Your family was here, extremely briefly, Detective." Ruvik said gently. "But the dead see more than the living. They chose to reincarnate, it meant waiting in another area of this realm, and that also meant not being able to contact you. But your wife is alive and well, even now. Well, not now precisely-" He smiled and looked over at me. "But close enough."

I digested all this. It couldn't be possible. Reincarnation wasn't real and I certainly wasn't Skulduggery's wife. But I put it on the back burner while Ruvik turned to the Dead Men. "There are choices to be made, gentleman. The way over and back must be sealed after we go. One must stay, though more than that can choose to."

He and Vicky walked away to let us decide amongst ourselves. "I'm staying." Kenspeckle said grimly. "I forgot how annoying the living are. Here I can work in peace."

Ghastly nodded then he and Anton looked at Corrival. "No, you can't, please." I begged, "What about Tanith?" I asked.

Ghastly smiled at me fondly. "Tanith and I had this discussion. We all cheated, Valkyrie. Everyone who crossed over cheated. We won't tear a hole in the universe or destroy life as we know it by staying in the world of the living, but we only came back for a brief time, sweetheart." He hugged me to him tightly. "And I got to see you married, more or less. And walk you down the aisle. I'll never forget that."

He stepped back and Corrival gave me a hug. "Elect a Grand Mage with some common sense, Val." He said gruffly, then Anton was hugging me tightly.

"You I'll miss." He said, his smile warm and gentle. Then they stepped away and we were returning to the world of the living. Those of us that made the return trip stared at one another.

"Cheer up, everyone." Dex said happily. "Corrival already made sure we could complete this without him. So gather 'round." He said and we did.

"Are you sure you want this?" Skulduggery asked. "Being married to the same man twice? I wouldn't want you to be bored with me."

"Shut up, Skulduggery." I said fondly.

"Yes, dear."

* * *

 **Ta-da! They get married and those that are left have grand adventures.**


	26. Chapter 26

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery, Dex, Ghastly, Hopeless, Larrikin or the Dead Men.

* * *

We were gathered around Dex, but I couldn't help but feel sad. I'd known in the back of my mind that we'd cheated, but it wasn't fair. It wasn't right. Ruvik cleared his throat. "Where are the photographers?" He asked annoyed. There was a flash of light and the two cameras appeared. "About time." He said, smiling slightly. But it wasn't the cameras I cared about, it was the people they'd brought with them.

I stared at the Dead Men and they looked back at me, Ghastly smiling. "We had to go back to help seal up the opening between the worlds. I just didn't mention that we didn't have to stay there." He said with a smile. I tackled him and the others in a tight hug, even Hopeless and Larrikin who were clearly stuck as vampires.

The wedding continued, we exchanged rings, and then Skulduggery and I were off for our honeymoon. "Why didn't they tell us about it being temporary?" I asked and Skulduggery shrugged.

"I suppose because there was a good chance it wouldn't work. And that's how Ruvik is. He never lets you know what's coming until it happens. I admire that, it fills life with surprises."

"Are you sure you're OK? You were abducted-"

"Oh, yes. Quite. I had known I didn't feel the same way for my family and felt tremendously guilty, but now I know why."

"You can't seriously believe I reincarnated-" I said but he peered at me from behind his disguise and I knew he did.

"Those are some travel clothes, by the way. Planning on getting into a fight or two on our wedding night?" He asked, looking over at me and I laughed. I had on the clothes Ghastly had made for me. It was a tad chilly out and the hood was nice and warm. It also meant I could be a skeleton for a while. I sighed wistfully.

"Will we have- I mean, I'd like a little girl if it is all the same to you, then a little boy."

"It's more than possible. As for getting our child back I don't know, Valkyrie. But if you chose to return to me, she may well choose to return to us." I nodded, still not believing a word of any of it. It was too preposterous to think anyone ever came back, outside of our friends coming back the way they did. I mentally shrugged it off. It was a day to be celebrated after all.

"You haven't even asked where we're going. Some detective I made out of you." Skulduggery said dryly.

"Knowing you? This is a case." I said and he looked and me and cursed softly under his breath.

"Then I built better than I realized. The clues?"

I counted off on my fingers. "One, you didn't object when I changed into these clothes. Two, we never packed any bags though you could have hidden some in the boot. Three, you are all keyed up like when we have a good case."

"Well done. Yes, just a tiny one, really. No saving the world this time, but I wanted to check something being in the underworld jogged my memory on. Then, I promise, a proper honeymoon. Though we really aren't the vacationing type."

"Vacationing is boring. I'd rather have a case." I admitted and I sensed his smile through his disguise.

"That's my girl."

It turned out that we were headed to where Skulduggery's home with his first wife had been. I still refused to believe I was a reincarnation of anyone, but if it made Skulduggery happy I didn't mind too much. The home was long gone in our world but the ruins were still there. We were out in the middle of nowhere so hopefully nobody saw when Skulduggery went to the boot for a compact shovel.

He walked to the center of the ruins and started digging, hitting a box fairly quickly. Skulduggery prised it out of the middy ground then manipulated air and water to clean it. He reverently laid it in the boot and got back in after patting the ground back down. "Let's be off then. Seatbelt." He said happily.

I nodded and clicked it. "So, what's in the box?"

"You'll see and it will set both our minds at rest."

"Um, OK."

"It's something that can only be used by the original owner, ever. That includes reincarnation, actually. So if you are reincarnated and the original owner it will work for you."

"And if it doesn't?" I asked carefully and he shrugged.

"Then it doesn't. My world won't end if Ruvik is wrong, Valkyrie. But there's always been something about you I could never put my finger on. This will simply show us if it is reincarnation or something else."

I nodded, hoping that Skulduggery wouldn't be too devastated when whatever was in the box didn't work. Though a little voice in the back of my mind was whispering that it would.

* * *

 **OK, I have a lot more in store for you, but I wanted to leave a little cliffy there. Will Val be Skul's first wife reincarnated? If she is what does that even mean? And if she isn't can their marriage survive? More to follow!**


	27. Chapter 27

A/N: I don't own Valkyrie, Skulduggery or George Eastman. Thanks go out to **A Girl Possessed By A Remnant** for the review and follow!

* * *

Skulduggery and I arrived at the end of our journey and after we checked in he brought two bags he had hidden in the boot into the small cottage he'd rented for us and the box. I was suddenly nervous. What if whatever was in the box was broken? Or worse, what if it wasn't and it didn't work? But the longer I stared at it the more I felt a tug of memory and laughed. "Wouldn't it be funny if there was a camera in there?" I asked.

"What would make you say that?" Skulduggery asked, as he untied the thick leather straps.

"It just popped into my head that that is what's in there." I said with a shrug. "And- Never mind, you wouldn't believe me."

"Well, what's in this box has awaited her true companion for a very long time. She was created in 1887 on American soil, and we loved her very much. Come see." Skulduggery beckoned and I went over, curious. He lifted the lid and inside, after he unwrapped her, was a wooden box with a metal plate on it identifying it as a camera.

I touched her tentatively. "What should she do?" I asked as I opened her very carefully. Skulduggery said nothing, but watched me silently. I ran my hands along her bellows, wishing she didn't look so old and fragile. The camera shook, then shook again and she started to repair herself before my eyes.

In seconds the camera looked brand new. "Wow." I said.

"Wow, indeed. She must be sleepy so give her a few more seconds." He said.

I did, and watched as the camera shook herself like a dog, then kept shaking until a little dragon the same colour as her frame had been sat before me. She stretched he tiny neck and flapped her wee wings then turned and blinked her soulful golden eyes at me and started purring. "Mama." She said happily, then crawled into my lap and went promptly to sleep.

"She's beautiful!" I said, stroking her scaly body and marveling in how warm she was. She rolled over in her sleep, presenting her belly for a rub. One eye opened to look at me from her silly position and I laughed as she rolled back over and promptly fell asleep again.

Skulduggery titled his head in a smile. "And she's why I was so upset when I first learned Ruvik had changed to be with Vicky. You see, in rare cases the camera can want to change, to be a companion. The moment you were taken away she went inactive. She wouldn't wake up for me because she had bonded to you." He said and I thought I heard tears in his voice.

"Naughty girl." I scolded and Skulduggery laughed as he dug into the box again producing old photos. I gasped when I saw them because I remembered taking them. Skulduggery had been a strikingly handsome man when he was alive and he looked straight into the camera as if he knew it too. He had taken some too, mostly of me, and we were going over our shared history when there was a gentle knock at the cottage door.

Skulduggery answered it and Vicky and Ruvik walked in. "We won't stay long." Vicky said softly. "We just wanted to make sure she's in tiptop shape." She hunkered down in front of me and smiled at the sleeping dragon curled on my lap. The dragon sleepily opened her eyes and yawned, sticking her tiny pink tongue out.

She looked at Vicky and made a curious purring sound. "Hello!" The wee dragon said, wagging her small tail excitedly

"Hello, sweetheart." Vicky said gently. "We'd just like to look at you to make sure you're healthy after your long nap, OK?" She asked and the dragon nodded. She leapt off my lap into Vicky's arms and the two examined her both as a dragon then as a camera. Ruvik transformed himself, talking in excited whirrs and clicks and my camera answered him. I smiled at the sight. And as I did I remembered her Taken name. "It looks like Georgia likes him." I said and Vicky nodded.

"Same company. George Eastman was alive at the time Georgia was made. She was among the very first you know and very rare, only four hundred and four were ever made. Thank you for letting us meet her, It's been an honour." She blinked back happy tears, then indulged Ruvik with a few photos after getting Georgia's permission.

They left us, Ruvik going on excitedly about Georgia while Vicky seemed ready to cry. I looked at Skulduggery. "A camera a man like Eastman produced is a powerful thing, Valkyrie. Without cameras like Georgia cameras like Ruvik wouldn't exist. It would still be a rarefied art practiced by a select few."

"Wow." I said and he nodded.

"Wow, indeed." He said. "Why don't we get a bite to eat and take Georgia with us? She's perfectly usable, and you have your choice of dry plates or roll film. I think she'll insist on going with us." He said fondly, and at his suggestion our camera was bouncing, raring to go. My memory on plates was really fuzzy so we loaded her with film and were off, taking her tripod as well.

I actually enjoyed the chance to work with her again, and each time I used her more memories of my old life flooded back. We stopped often to set up for shots, avid photographers stopping to admire her. When we found a small inn for lunch we took Georgia with us, both of us agreeing she couldn't be locked in the boot and we be safer and happier with us.

She sat on the table in her utter glory, basking in the admiring glances and utter adoration people heaped on her. I smiled at Skulduggery. "I never imagined anything like this, to be truthful. She was our first child in a way, wasn't she?" I asked and he nodded.

"She was, and you better get used to stopping traffic with her, Valkyrie. She may have to shift forms, but she's with her mama again. She isn't letting go of you for anything. That's the same reason you saw those cameras glom on to Vicky when they left. They are hers and she is theirs and the wrath of the camera is far worse than the wrath of the photographer at times."

"I'll take your word for it." I said and settled back into my seat with a sigh, perfectly content to have most of our family reunited again.

* * *

 **I don't apologize for that. I had just came off several days of shooting and writing camera articles. I won't make Georgia disappear or something. A world with no cuddly little dragon cameras? Never! Because that would just be silly. She could hide in Valkyrie's coat and pop out to attack the bad guys. And an adorable baby dragon that purrs would melt anyone's heart.**

 **Note: Eastman Interchangeable View Cameras had a total production of 404 cameras. They shot both dry plates and film, something pretty revolutionary for the time. The ultimate rejection of his roll film by professionals would lead Eastman to release the first camera for the masses in 1885.**

 **This story took a turn to sci-fi but I still enjoy it. It was meant to go on much longer, but sometimes things don't work out the way we planned. I liked the idea of have shapeshifting good and bad guys, the focus would have been on cameras, but expanded, most likely into a war between good and evil, Or not.**

 **But the idea that they are omnipresent now and you can have a hard time buying tech without a camera installed in it (think phones, tablets, notebooks, etc.) made me think of how a war between two sides would play out in the SP world. Would they stay hidden and fight below mortal radar, or have one epic battle exposing magic as well? And who is to say it wasn't all some new form of magic?**


End file.
